Monday 10-22

I had several lessons this afternoon and evening.  It was a nice lesson day.  My two littlest ones will be switching to Mondays instead of Wednesday.  It seems to work better for them so it works for me.  I like being able to be flexible for the parents, not only does it helps them but it helps me if I need to change a lesson for some reason.

It was such a nice, low key weekend with Kathy.  I thought it was cute that Kathy's girls wanted to come with her.  I am just glad that I didn't flare and we had fun.

I have to do some paperwork this week that I keep forgetting to do.  I FINALLY wrote it down so I will do it tomorrow.  I need to get this done as soon as possible.  Wow, my spelling is not so hot tonight.  So far I have forgotten how to spell about 3 or 4 words.

I am really getting tired tonight so I will be heading to bed early.

Lovely weekend

Oh my, it was such a lovely couple of days with Kathy here.  She arrived Saturday morning.  While I taught my few lessons, she ran over to the Disney Store in the mall.  There is not a Disney Store in her area so when she comes here, she always goes to see what is new and with Christmas coming, it is good to start ahead when you have 4 children like she does.  When I was finished, we went out to lunch/dinner at a restaurant that I had gift certificates for.  We both really enjoyed the food there.  I have a little bit left for another visit so that is good.  Kathy and I are both HUGE MacGyver fans so I had a disc of movies that were done after the series was over.  I had not seen either one of them and neither had Kathy so that is what we did, we watched 2 MacGyver movies and boy were they good not to mention how we were remembering our college days when we were totally enthralled with Richard Dean Anderson.  *Ah*, it was such fun.  We chatted some more before we headed for bed.  Mom's old room is one of the guest rooms so that was where she slept.  I got up after she did, but that is nothing unusual as I tend to sleep in more than most people I know.  I got up at 10 and after getting ready for the day, we went to Chipotle's for lunch.  Kathy had never been there and apparently there is one on the opposite side of town from her so she was in for a treat.  She loved it as much as I do.  If I wasn't so full from lunch, I would want more, thankfully, I am full and not going to eat anymore.  After lunch, Kathy had to leave to go home.  She was planning to stop at her parents' house since she would pretty much go right past there on her way home.  Her dad had surgery last week and is doing fine, but she wanted to visit them anyway.  Her parents are really two of the nicest people ever.  I spend the 3 major holidays with them.  I am very lucky about that too.  I have known them most of my life since Kathy and I have been friends since we were 3, but still, to be a part of their holidays, is very nice of them plus I get to see Kathy and the kids, which is definitely a plus.

One of the nicest things about this weekend was I didn't have a bad headache at all yesterday or today, just the usual dull headache.  It did hurt a bit more than usual when I went to bed, but when I woke up it wasn't too bad at all so I am one thankful Fibro girl.  It is also good that if I did, Kathy wouldn't be mad at me or anything and I knew she would be up for whatever I needed to do if it was bad but since it wasn't, that is great.

This afternoon, I have 2 lessons.  Both are piano lessons, although one is usually a voice lesson but he wants to learn a bit more about the piano.  It was strange yesterday that my two girls weren't here for their lessons.  They are moving in a few weeks so I am thinking that maybe they got caught up in it.  I did leave a message on their mom's cell phone, so I am hoping they will call and let me know what happened.  They have never just not shown up without a phone call before.  This is very weird.  The two girls are so sweet and cute as well as their little sister.  I am hoping that everything is okay with them.  I am planning on calling them again this evening to see if everything is all right.

October

I hate this month.  I have since 2010.  This week just upsets me beyond words at time.  2 years ago at this time I was watching my beautiful mother die.  It was the hardest thing because I couldn't fix her and I wanted her fixed.  I didn't want her to go.  I only wanted her to stay.  I would have done almost anything to keep her here with me.  I asked about what they could do and they said there wasn't anything that they could do.  I just miss her so much.  Add family issues to the incredible sadness at this time of year, I wonder how I can get up at all.  Some days, I just want to stay in my nice warm bed and not face the day.  It isn't as bad at times as it used to be, but some days it is really hard.  I just wish that I could sleep through all of October, maybe someday it won't be so bad.  Today is just a bad day.

the start of the new week 10-13

I missed church again this morning because of another bad headache.  Right now it isn't too bad, but the evening is still young.  I am watching a marathon of Law and Order, SVU.  I do like this show a lot.  I think I have seem most of the episodes except for the last season.  I could never remember when it was on.  It is on Wednesdays at 9 pm.  I will have to remember that.

Aggie's costume is almost finished.  I will have the bulk of it done by Friday.  Aggie is coming Friday morning so we can put the finishing touches on it.  She received the wig for her costume yesterday.  She looked good with it on.

Becca had her lesson today.  We have picked most of her music for competition.  She is doing the cutest Renaissance piece for classical.  It is from the time of Elizabeth 1.  It also was in the movie, "Vanity Fair".  I saw it years ago with my mother.  I remember being excited that the character sang that song.  Her Broadway and her Pop songs are all picked.  She is just having a bit of trouble with choosing her Inspirational song.  Becca is down to 2 choices for that category.  I also need to ask Natalie if she would like to sing a duet with Becca.  I am sure she will so it is just a matter of picking out a song.

Other than 1 lesson, it has been a very quiet day.  I am going to read some more and then head for bed.

Saturday 10/13

It is almost mid October, hard to believe.  I received some sad news this afternoon.  My lovely Wama and Deema will be moving so next week is their last week.  I will miss them so much as they are such lovely students and so talented.  They are such wonderful girls.  The whole family is wonderful.  I love their mother, she is such a lovely person.  I am hoping that someday I will be able to visit them in Dubai.  That is something I plan to save for because I would love to see them there and visit their country.  I just can't say enough of how wonderful the family is.  They came to get ice cream when I had my birthday and we celebrated Lulu's 5th birthday together a few weeks ago.  I plan to stay in touch with them through face book.  I am thankful for face book because of the message feature.  I can hear how they are doing.  I know that they miss their dad and they will be with him again shortly.  The girls plan to play piano when they move so that is really good.  I can't believe that next week will be their last lesson with me.

I can't wait until next weekend though because Kathy is coming to visit!!!!!!  It should be awesome.  We haven't been able to arrange a time to hang out just the two of us so this is long overdue.  With both our schedules, it just hasn't worked out.  Not only does she have her schedule, but her husband's and her children's schedules too while I only have my little schedule.  I am looking forward to have her here for the weekend.

Aggie and I were working on her costume for Halloween this afternoon.  I have measured the part that I need to redesign.  She is going to be Merida from the movie Brave.   So far, it is turning out pretty well.  I will make the adjustments tomorrow.  I am happy with how it is turning out.

Time to read a bit and then head for bed.

Thursday/Friday

Thursday:

It has been an okay day until about 5:30, then my headache got worse so I missed choir practice yet again this week.  I sure hope that by Sunday it will be better.  I am really tired of this too.  I do hope by tomorrow it will be back to the normal, everyday headache.

Lessons went well today.  I was a bit tired when I finished teaching, but that is mostly from the headache.  I was going to sew some of Aggie's dress tonight, but my head will not allow me to do that.

Friday:

My head is mostly back to the normal, everyday headache.  I did go to bed early last night because my head hurt so much.  Today, it seems it will be alright so that is a good thing.

I got the results of my blood tests back.  Apparently, my hemoglobin is very, very low.  Normal for me is around 12.5, normal for everyone else, is about 13.  Mine at this point is at 10.6, which means somewhere in the stomach or colon is bleeding so I have to do a test here at home and then send it away for the results.  this test tends to gross me out but I guess it has to be done and no more ignoring it, which I have been doing for, oh, about a year now.  Both Dr. G and Dr. T want this done so I will bite the bullet and do this during the weekend and hope I don't gross out from it.

Things have calmed down with the family now.  I still have to make some decisions that are hard, but I am weighing all my options.  I am much calmer and less upset than I was on Sunday when everything hit the fan and flung itself on me.  I don't do well in situations like that because of the fibro fog.  Once people starting going on and on harshly, I can't think.  When they talk to fast and so much, I just can't really follow them.  It takes time for me to process exactly what is being said and what I need to say.  Instead, I couldn't think properly or answer properly.  I do hope the next time I am discussing these details, they will slow down and let me think otherwise, I don't know what is really going on nor will I totally understand what is being said.  I am just glad this has smoothed out for now.

I have some lovely lessons today.  Acer, Calli, Emily, and Antoinette.  Antoinette is actually a make up lesson from Wednesday when she as unable to come.  The other three are their normally scheduled lessons.  Oh, I just remembered, I have to copy a CD for Allison.  I will be right back.  Okay, I am back.  Boy am I glad I went to get the CD because it reminded me about the other CDs I need to copy and burn.  Good thing I went up.  The group song for Christmas this year is called, "Oh What a Merry Christmas Day", it is from Mickey's Christmas Carol.  I know, it is so not a surprise that I picked a Disney Song for the group song.  It is very me.  We are starting to pick Christmas music now.  Some students have already picked theirs but others are thinking about it and I will be pulling a lot of it out in the next week or so.

Well, on to doing the work I need to do for students!

Feeling a bit better 10-10

I am feeling a bit better and much, much, much calmer than I did on Sunday night when I got home.  I so appreciate the prayers and comments.  I am no longer as upset as I was.  I think taking the few days to think, pray, and calm down really helped.  I still have some decisions to make, but over all, it will work out somehow.  I do have faith that God will show me what to do and where to turn.  Sometimes I just seem to forget to ask Him and try to go without Him.  We all know what a mistake that is!!!

I met with my friend, Jen from high school and her mom for lunch today.  She is such a good friend and I really like her mom too.  We had a great time chatting away during the meal.  We went to Olive Garden and I got the soup with salad lunch so I stayed on the healthy side of food.  I must confess that I am getting rather frustrating with the losing of weight as I have somehow managed to gain what I had originally lost.  Fortunately, next week Wednesday, I am going to the hospital for a seminar about their weight loss program.  I am not interested in the surgery as I would not be a candidate for it with my blood disorder, however I do believe they have other options so that is what I will look into.  I just hope it doesn't cost that much.  We shall see.

I have a few lesson tonight.  I am so thankful for the lessons I do have.  Tomorrow I have a new one for voice.  Her name is Rachael and she wants to be an opera singer so we will start with the 24 Italian art songs and arias along with the young singer.  She also wants to be able to read music and I did tell her that would be very necessary for her goal.  I am so glad that she is starting tomorrow and not next week!

I am working on being thrifty.  It is hard but I am doing okay with it.  I am not as good as mom with stretching the dollar as well as she could, but overall I think I am doing okay.  This is also Sarah's second lesson with me today.  I am glad that she remembers as much as she does since she hadn't had a piano lesson in about a year.  She is a very sweet young lady.  I think she will fit right in with all the other students.  She is quiet but that will help balance out the ones that aren't very quiet.  I do have quite a few that are quiet and several who are more outgoing.  Mostly, I have notice that my students are nice to each other and some of them have even become friends.  For example, Natalie Z and Calli are friends now after meeting at the concerts.  I am having the girls do a Christmas Duet this year in addition to their solos.  I think it will be really good and they will sound nice together.

My CD player that I use for teaching has died.  It will not read anymore CDs so I had to purchase a new one tonight after lessons.  I hope I picked a good one, it wasn't too expensive so that was good.  I just didn't want to have to get one right now.  Oh well, this should last for a few years.

Last week I had my hair cut.  It is just about at the shoulders.  The stylist cut about 12 inches off my hair.  I had had a bad headache for 3 days the previous weekend and I could feel each strand of my hair so it had to go.  I do like it and the important thing, it is easier to wash and brush being a bit shorter also it can still go in a ponytail.

I am going to read for a bit and then head to bed.

I am not sure what to say today.  So much happened last night that I just don't know what to say.  It has left me speechless and I am rarely, if ever, speechless.  Needless to say, I need prayers, lots and lots of them for guidance on what to do next.  Decisions have to be made and I am not sure which way to go, I really don't know.  I can't give any specifics, but they are big decisions and I need lots of prayers to make the right choice.  If ever I have needed God's help, this is it.

It has been very hard for me both emotionally and financially since the passing of my mom.  I miss her every minute of every day and I suspect I will until I die.  I finally now feel like I have some headway and much more sure footing with the financial end of things.  I still have the signs up on her bedroom door and mine that say whose room is whose.  Mom got confused one day and so I put up a sign so she knew it was her room.  It was actually kind of cute how she would read the sign every night so she knew it was her room.  I miss the little things like that of her.  Most of all, I miss her smile and telling me that she loves me and me telling her how much I love her.  See her pictures usually make me smile.

I am very tired tonight.  I had to get up early for a doctor's appointment.  I had to have several tubes of blood drawn for several different tests.  It took 4 pokes today to draw me.  It was rather painful since it took so many pokes.  Thankfully, they did finally get it done.  I have anemia and the doctors can't really find out why.  At this point, I do not have an ulcer.  It is gone so there isn't any bleeding in my stomach.  I take iron now, which is something I couldn't do a few months ago.

I think I will just read for a bit and then go to bed early.  I am just so tired from last evening.

Friendships 10-6

I just finished a book called Firefly Lane.  It is by Kristin Hannah and it is a wonderful book.  It is about 2 friends and their lives, which made me think about the friendship of Kathy and I.  Kathy and I met when we were about 3 as far as we know.  We both went to the same church and were in Sunday School together.  Neither one of us actually remembers meeting the other, we just know that we have always be a pair.  Then when we started school, we went to the same school and were in the same classroom from Kindergarten to 3rd grade.  During our school years we had the usual ups and downs as most friends do.  We didn't go to the same college.  Kathy went to Western Michigan and I went to Wayne State.  We would write each other letters about college and quite often the letters were written while we should have been taking notes in our classes.  That was something we both did quite a lot.  After college, Kathy moved back into this area.  We would hang out and watch the original 90210 and Melrose Place every week with friends.  Those were our shows no matter how ridicules they became.  We would yell at the TV at Michael and how bad his character was, but overall, it was just bonding and enjoying the company.  When Kathy met Tony, now her husband, she didn't tell us right away.  I remember her wedding so vividly.  I was so excited for her.  It was one of the best days of my life.  I was so happy that she had found her husband.  Kathy was so tired by the time her wedding came, that I think I was a bit more excited than her.  It was just an amazing day.

This evening was a fun one.  Aggie came over for sewing.  We went to the fabric store, picked out a costume pattern, bought the fabric and then went back here.  Then we fitted the pattern to her and proceeded to cut out the pieces.  Right now it is a bag where it will be safe.  I plan to put some of the pieces together this week before she comes home next weekend.

I had 2 lessons today, Nina and Sean.  It was Sean's first time.  He did quite well.  I did expect he would because he is very interested in music.  This was Nina's 3rd lesson and she is doing very well too.  I think most of my students doing quite well.  There are only a small number that do not practice so they do not learn as much as my other students.  I do what I can with them and they do like coming for lessons so that is a good thing.

It is getting late now, so I am going to read for a bit.  I am starting a new book tonight since I finished the other this morning.

Oh my, Friday 10-5

I am actually rather glad that it is Friday, but my I am tired tonight.

I had my hair cut on Monday.  it is about at my shoulders right now instead of halfway down my back. I don't really miss the long hair yet.  However, after a few days in a row of having really bad headaches that I could feel every piece of hair on my head, I had to get it cut.  I do like it though.

Today was a busy day with some lessons and running errands.  I had to go and get a lesson book for my new student tomorrow.  I only have 2 lessons tomorrow.  Aggie is coming over to work on sewing for her Halloween costume.  She is going to be Merida from the movie Brave.  She will look so cute as Merida although she doesn't have red hair like Merida does.

It is getting colder out now since it is October.  October used to be my favorite month, now I hate it.  This is the month that I lost my mom.  I still miss her a lot, but it is much easier getting through the days and nights than it was a couple of months ago.  My friend, Star's Mom helped me a lot plus I now think about the day we will be reunited in Heaven and never to be a part again.  I look forward to that day, but meanwhile, I will live as best as I can.

Headaches-wise, my head was really sore yesterday but I did manage to teach and go to choir practice. Tonight it is a medium bad headache.  I have taken something for it so I hope it goes down to the regular, everyday headache.  For some reason, my shins and calves have been hurting a lot these past few days.  I don't know why or what I did to it, but I am thankful that it is getting better.

I was reading one of my regular blogs that I read and something struck me.  I don't understand people, but I guess on one of the facebook pages for Fibro, there is some really mean comments.  I mean, seriously, we should be sticking together instead of insulting each other.  I just don't understand that kind of thing.  It is the same with the tabloids, who reads them?  Who even believes them?  I can't even look at their front page.  It is so mean and invading people's privacy.  Anyways, I have never understood this kind of behavior.  If we don't stick together and stand up to the nay sayers, who will?

Sunday will be Canadian Thanksgiving Dinner and a 50th birthday party for my lovely cousin, Maia.  I hope she likes what I got her.

a confession 10-2

I must confess that I have not been doing well with the giving up diet coke.  Yes, it is true.  Last evening I went to Chipotle for dinner and out of habit, I ordered a drink and filled it with diet coke before I remembered that I had given up diet coke and pop in general.  Ugh, this is not very easy like I had hoped.  I will try again tomorrow.  It reminds me of a part of Anne of Green Gables when Anne says something to the effect of how great tomorrow it is a day that isn't filled with mistakes yet.  I love Anne of Green Gables.  Lucy Maud Montgomery really wrote one of the best characters of all time when she came up with Anne Shirley.  She really did.  I can't even count how many times I have read those books but each time I get such a thrill from them.  If Anne Shirley were real, we would be kindred spirits.

Today was a pretty good day as far as teaching goes.  I had 4 students.  Sammy was the first one.  She is a singer and is doing really well.  She is really picking up the Italian songs fast.  Sammy has picked her Christmas song.  Amy is learning to play both hands at the same time.  She was a bit nervous, but she played the songs very well.  Dan is doing pretty well with learning his notes and Aubrey, well Aubrey is really advancing quickly.  She started after Christmas last year and has finished 3 books so far.  She is now in level 3.

I also saw my Muglia girls today.  Hannah and Natalie told me how much they loved the art class that they took from Star.  They are going to have lessons every week.  I can't wait to see what they create.  Star is a really good artist too.  Her mother, Paula, an is amazing artist.

I had dinner with the Hubel family tonight.  Carolyn made spaghetti and meatballs.  It was very good.

I am getting a bit tired now, so I think it is time to read a bit before bed.