monday

It is a bad missing Momma day.  It has been since last night.  Tears and more tears.  It hurts worse than the physical fibro pain I have.  I can't seem to get a hold of myself today.  yesterday, I spent most of the day in bed as I also have a very bad headache.  I still have it.  I don't know.  It doesn't seem to get any better.  I just want my mom.  That's all.  Nothing more, just my Mom.  I know she is gone, but I still want her.

brrr, it is so cold outside

I think I slept the day away.  I am so tired and my head hurts pretty bad today.  I got up rather late and was still so tired that I had to go and lay back down.  It is just one of those type days.  I will be heading for bed early tonight too.  I am just so exhausted today.  I didn't go out at all today because it is so cold out and no reason to go out.  I decided yesterday that I wasn't going to go out today because it was going to be so cold.  Well, it is really cold out.  Around zero without the windchill.  I don't know how cold it is out with the windchill, below zero I imagine.  I am not liking the cold this year.  It didn't seem to bother me so much last year like it is this year.  I am not sure why.  Tomorrow I have 4 lessons as usual so that is good.  I have a new student on Tuesday and another new on Saturday.  Wednesday, I have to go to Windsor for a bit before teaching at 4 pm.  It will be a nice and busy week.  I like that in a week.  I dread downtime at times. It depends on what I want to do during the downtime.  Sometimes it is nice to have it.  It comes in handy when you don't feel well to.  It was good that I didn't have to teach today since my head is so sore.  I do hope it goes down to normal by tomorrow in time for teaching.  Sometimes, teaching helps the head relax a bit too.

It is a normal pain day for everything else except the head.  I am way more tired than usual for some odd reason.  it is a normal missing mom day, although with not feeling well today, it is nice to be able to rest and not worry about her.  Though, I would rather have to worry about her than have her not here.

I do hope your day was fine and everything okay.  i hope you are warm during this cold spell.

Cold outside

It is so cold outside today!  I am staying in the house for the evening.  I am not going out and I don't foresee me going out tomorrow either.  It is just so cold out.  I am toasty warm in the house today and loving every minute of it.  It is a good day around here.  I had 4 lessons this afternoon, Katie, Amanda, Kayla, and Amanda P.  All are doing very well with lessons.  Katie is getting ready for competition.  She is working on Ave Maria by Schubert for her Classical piece.  She has it almost down pat.  Her Broadway piece, I could Have Danced All Night is pretty much almost ready.  My three newer ones are doing well too.  Over all, I must say I am pleased with how the students are doing.

It is a normal missing Mom day, not a bad one, just the normal one.  I changed the wallpaper in my phone to a different picture of her.  I have several good pictures of the little lady.  On my computer are many more pictures of Mom too.  There are some with me.

I am starting to work on losing some of this weight.  I am not going to be going to the usual anymore unless it is to meet someone for tea.  I need to cut back on spending, but I also need to cut back on junk food and eat more healthy food.  I bought some pop for here at home because I do like it, although I will be cutting back how much I drink of it.  I have some nice fruit cups that I do like, I just don't think about eating them because I don't normally have them here at home.  Well, I got them now and will eat them.  i also got some bananas, which I also like.  I do like fruit.  I just don't eat enough of it.  I have bought some more meat that isn't prepackaged so that is good too.  I think I have gained a bit of weight since Mom passed away and that is not good.  I need to lose the weight, not gain it so I will be working hard on that.  That is my new goal.  I have been working on the machines downstairs a bit, but I can't do very much of them.  I have looked to see about swimming but there really isn't anywhere near by for me to go.  I will keep looking until I find something I can afford.  With more students, maybe I can afford something near by.  So far, the ones I have looked into are very expensive.  I will keep looking.

I worked a bit on the plan of the house.  I also worked on the to do list.  Some of the stuff is weekly to do, but some of it is not.  I am working on my weekly house work to figure out what day to do what so I don't over do it.  I don't want to over do it at all.

Overall, it has been a decent day.  I am relaxing now after a busy afternoon.  I like when I have busy afternoons and evenings, it makes me feel better over all.  I am going to read for a bit before I make any dinner.  I hope it has been a good day for you too!  Stay warm!  It is cold in so many places today!

paperwork friday

I turned in all the paperwork.  Well, I hope it was all the paperwork.  I couldn't turn in my pay stub  because I haven't gotten my first paycheck from takelessons.com yet.  I get it on the 5th so that is good.  I have a busy afternoon tomorrow.  I have 4 lessons so I am excited about that.  I had Stephanie's this afternoon.  She is doing pretty well for just starting the song.  She does have one piece pretty much memorized.  She has solo and ensemble in 2 weeks now.  I will see her on Wednesday next week for 90 minutes.  I was nervous about the length of the lesson, but it goes pretty quick, so I am happy about that.  I have another solo and ensemble student tomorrow.  Both these students are temporary ones, but I do hope they turn into permanent ones, but if they don't that is okay.

It is so cold here.  It is supposed to be in the single digits this weekend.  Thank goodness I have a nice new parka to help keep me warm.  I also have a nice warm scarf and hat.  My gloves aren't that warm, but I have warmer ones if needed.  I do hope where you are is warmer than it is here.  We are also supposed to get more snow.  I think this is the weekend to stay home.  Thank goodness I got groceries yesterday!  Oh, wait, I have to get some medicine tomorrow.  Ugh.  that means I have to go out tomorrow.  I need the medicine or I would wait to next week.  I do have to go to Windsor next week for the afternoon.  I am going on Wednesday.  I will be going to Tillie's for lunch.  I have some business to attend to and then lunch.  I need to be home by 4 pm for Stephanie's lesson.  I don't anticipate that being a problem.  I am planning to arrive by 10 am so that I can leave by 1:30 after lunch.  I haven't actually seen Tillie since December at the family party and she was very busy that day.  I was having a rough day that day so I left early.  It was the 2 month anniversary of Momma's passing and it just hit me pretty hard.  It occurred to me that everyone there had someone except me, whether it was children, significant other, or mom, and I had no one.  They all had a little family of their own and I don't.  My little family is gone. It just wasn't a good day for me.  I was glad Darrin left early so that I could leave before dark too.  When I am that upset, it is best to leave before dark.  I have better contacts now so that is good, I can read street signs again.  I am frightened at times about my eyes and the macular degeneration.  Sometimes when I am typing the words are blurry and no matter what I do I can't get them to clear up.  It isn't everyday, but it is often enough that it drives me crazy.  Eyes are so important.  I know it is something I need to keep an eye on.  I do see better with the new contacts.  They are a new kind that allows lots of oxygen through so I no longer have the oxygen deprivation problem in my left eye.

I don't have any plans for Sunday right now.  Phoebe is supposed to stop by tomorrow afternoon to drop off the ladder.  I am hoping to see Peggy soon, I am not sure when.  As soon as Wendy is feeling better we will be meeting for tea.  She is so nice.  I wish we were closer in high school and the years after.  Well, we are friends now and that is what counts.  She is one of the friends that came to the viewing of Mom.  I really appreciated all my friends and family who came for those two days.  They were pretty awful.  I hope to never go through anything that awful again.

It has been a productive day for a change.  I did take a nap after I went to drop the paperwork off.  I didn't want to mail them because it could get lost in the mail and I don't want to lose that stuff so I dropped it off the the drop box.  The office is rather close to my house so it was no big deal.  I copied everything and then stuffed it in the envelope.  Now my dining room table has paperwork all over it again.  I will put the bills in the bill file tomorrow.  I am too tired to do this tonight.

I hope you had a good day.  It was for me.  I feel good when I get stuff done.  I hope that next week is productive too.  There are days when I feel like my old self again.  It happens more often than it did in a while.  I still have rough days though, I miss Momma all the time, but I am slowly reconstructing my world to a world without her.  I never really thought I would, yes, I know, that is awfully naive but that is me.  It is a world that I am slowly muddling through.  Some days, I am just treading water, while others I am drowning and some I am floating.  All in all, I am finding my strength, the strength I didn't think I had.  I guess I do have some, I just don't know how much.  i know Mom would want me to be strong.  That I know for sure.  She always said she wanted me to be strong and stand on my own two feet.  Well, I need a bit of help, with the standing on my own two feet, but I am doing alright.

a better day - but more snow!

I woke up late again today.  I have got to get out of this bad habit.  I have to copy some stuff to send in.  I am planning to copy them tomorrow and then drop them off.  I only have until tomorrow to do this so I have to get this done.  I can't not do this.

I had another new student this afternoon.  She is very nice and so is her mom.  She was a few minutes late because they got lost.  They had to call the company to get directions to my house.  they were about 5 to 7 minutes late.  That was okay as I don't have anyone else today.  Besides, it was the first lesson and you have to make allowances for timing on the first one.  I am excited to work with all my new students.  I do hope that they all have their books soon.  I am running out of books to loan out.  I have to pull some solo and ensemble music tomorrow for Amanda P tomorrow for Saturday.  I have Stephanie again tomorrow.  She is singing a song in French and it is very hard for her.  We worked on it for almost the entire 90 minutes yesterday for her lesson.  We shall see how much she practiced.  I hope she practiced a lot.  Solo and ensemble is only a few weeks away.  Amanda is going to solo and ensemble too and she hasn't picked her 2nd song yet.  I have a few ideas of songs that I think she will like.  I am excited about Saturday because I have 4 students that day.  Next Saturday, I will have 5 lessons.

I am possibly going to see Peggy this weekend.  I am not sure though.  I do hope so.  It would be fun.  I have gift certificates that I can use.

I went grocery shopping today.  I forgot to bring some cash for the medicine I need to pick up so I will have to do that tomorrow.  Oh well, not a big deal.  I will get the synthroid tomorrow.  I don't really want to go all the way to Walmart again, but I don't have a choice since that is where my medicine is filled at.  It is that time of month when my medicines all need to be refilled.  A few of them are refilled every few months though so that is good.  It makes the monthly cost cheaper.

I am still so tired.  I don't feel like I have completely regained my strength from getting the cold earlier this month.  I still feel so wiped out with it.  It is really getting annoying.  I am tired of sleeping so much. I am going to go to bed earlier tonight with the hopes that I get up earlier.  I want to be up by 11:30 latest.  11:00 would be better as I have things to do.  I want to get the stuff done early so I can be ready for the lesson at 4:30.  I am just so tired.

I am watching My First Place.  It is too funny to see people go into the potential house/condo's bathroom and complain that it is outdated and it looks fine.  They do that for the kitchens too.  Makes me wonder what they would say about our house as our bathrooms have never been redone.  Our kitchen, however, was redone in the late 90's and Mom did a great job.  Hayley would like me to repaint the dining room and kitchen but that is not on the top of my list of things to do.  I like the color, actually so I am not sure I would repaint it.  There are rooms I would like to repaint, but that is not on the list for right now.  I have to save money to do any changes of the house.  I rather like the house the way it is.  I like the way our house looks.  The only changes I see I need to make are to the yard right now.  I am hoping that Addison or his dad will be able to trim the bushes in the back yard.  I need the garden in the back yard weeded and the stones put back in.  I need a new bush in the corner of the garden.  Also, in front of the house will need some bushes too.  Andrew ripped them out and never put anything back.  I would like something there.  That probably won't get done until next summer, not this one, but the next one, but that is okay.  I don't mind.  I have time to deal with this stuff.  I still need to decide where to start with the house.  I have an idea of where I want to start and what I want to do.  I will start in a couple of weeks so I need to make sure I am not as exhausted as I am right now.

Well, I am heading to bed soon.  I am just so tired.  I hope I get a good sleep and wake up nice and refreshed!  Okay, now I am dreaming!  I just hope I am not as tired as I have been all day.  That is my goal.  I do hope your day has been good too!

a slightly bummed out day

I am a bit bummed out today.  The new adult student that I thought was all excited to learn to sing better and all that, well, he quit.  Yup, after one lesson, he quit.  So, since his girlfriend paid for 3 classes I will be refunding 2 of them to her.  I didn't put the money in the bank yet, so I still have it in the piggy bank.  Also, my 2 fish are dead.  Yup, that too.  I guess I am not any good at taking care of fish.  That kind of makes me sad too.  What can I say?  it is not my day.  I do hope the new student I have this afternoon, for 90 minutes, (I am a bit worried about how long the lesson is) goes well.  She has a performance in 3 weeks.  I don't know what her worries are about or anything or why they think 90 minutes is needed 2 times a week, I just don't know yet.  I shall find out soon enough as they arrive in 25 minutes.

I plan to do some grocery shopping this week.  I need to pick up a few things.  Not too many, just a few.  I also need to go to Windsor next week.  I haven't been there in a month.

Yesterday, was the 3 month anniversary of Momma's death.  I am a bit better than I was in October, but I still miss her so much.  At times, it seems unreal that I won't see her sitting in the living room or coming down the stairs or hearing her call my name.  I just can't believe that I won't be with her everyday like I was.  I wonder how my brothers are doing, but they are always like, move forward, don't look back.  Well, I miss Momma, how can I not look back?  She wasn't a big part of their lives like she was mine.  For a couple of years at the end, she was my life.  I miss taking care of her.  I miss her all the time and I am not so sure that will ever change.  I know I can move on with my life, but that doesn't mean I don't miss her because I do.  I just miss her a lot.

I hope today improves some, because it is just not my day.  I am looking forward to the lesson I will teach.  That will be in 15 minutes.

I do hope your day is good.

Tuesday

I had 2 lessons today.  I was a bit nervous over the new lesson because you never know how adults will react to classical music.  He was all for it.  I was very excited about that.  He seemed to like the song we started with and the broadway one too so that is good.  He needs to purchase 2 books.  Since I am not wanting to limit his range (he has a nice wide one) with picking 1 Broadway book so I will just loan out what he needs.  I copied his music this afternoon and the CDs too.  I will get him a binder (I have some downstairs) and page protectors.  He is very nice.  Charlie had his lesson too and he is doing pretty well with musical interpretation etudes.  They are rather hard, but he is doing alright with them.

Tomorrow I have a new student that is a temporary student.  She has a performance on February 5 and wants some help with her music.  She is actually coming Wednesday and Friday for 90 minutes.  I am not sure the 90 minutes is necessary, but I will find out.  Usually, an hour is the most that people have for lessons so this is new for me.  We shall see where she is with the music that she is performing.

I also need to pull some music tomorrow for my new one on Thursday.  The newest one on Saturday is going to solo and ensemble for school and needs one more song that is off the list.  I will pull the alto books that are on the list or the ones I think are on the list.  I figure by the end of the lesson we will have a song for her.  I also have another new student next Saturday for piano.  He is an adult.  I spoke to him today.  I will get the books for him and he will pay me back.  It will be easier to pick up the books and then I know he will get the right ones.

This week I have students every day except on Sunday.  It is the first time in a long time that I have lessons every day.  I do know that the Wednesday and Friday student is just temporary, although it would be nice if she switched after the performance to a weekly student.  I can only hope.

I had to turn the heat back up again.  I just couldn't help it.  I was so cold even with the little heater, I was still so cold.  Now that I am on the special program that protects against getting the heat shut off.  I pay the same amount every month for 18 months and then they look at how much heat I use and then make the adjustments for the next 18 months.  I called them for information on the budget plan.  They usually do the budget plans in May not January so that plan was out for me, but I am happy with what I have now.  My electric bill is almost the same every month so I not worried about that.  This new development really helps the budget a lot.  I am glad about that.

I am tired a bit tonight.  I was very tired earlier but then I perked up.  I am almost over this cold.  I think tonight I am not going to take the cold nighttime medicine because I think that is why I am so tired these last few weeks.  We shall see if this helps.  I sure hope so.  I am tired of being even more tired than I always am.  I need more energy to get through the day.

Tomorrow I hope to move all the violins so that I can take pictures of the shuffleboard for my cousin, Darrin's friend.  I have to measure it too.  I hope to have it gone by the end of the month.  That would be nice.  It would be nice too if he wanted the bar stools too but that is too much to hope for.  I don't want them as they are in the way.  I do want the round table and the chairs that go with it.  It will be good for sewing.  I have a couple of other tables for sewing too.  I hope to have a nice sewing room by summer.  The other half of the room will have a sofa and a chair with a TV and exercise equipment.  I want to use it for exercising.  I am keeping two of the exercising machines and the rest can go.  I will put shelves along 2 walls so that we will have storage for sewing stuff and other things.  I do need to eventually get another book shelf for the family room too.  I like having one on each side of the sliding door and one of them went into the living room.  I am going to move the DVDs and all my books back downstairs to the book shelves.  It will be better for them as I like to watch DVDs while I exercise.  The family room will be awesome when I finish with it.  First thing, is getting rid of the shuffleboard.  It is in the way right now.  Of course, nothing will be done until after tax season except for moving the shuffleboard out of the room.

All in all, it has a good day.  I hope your day was good too.  I am excited that I have a good week planned.

Monday - busy lesson day

I had 3 lessons today.  Little man, Acer, has a fever so he didn't come for his lesson.  I do hope he is going to be back to normal shortly.  Bob and Calli had their lessons and both are doing very well.  Bob has a 2 part invention by JS Bach and a Sonata by Mozart while Calli is learning Red River Valley on the piano.  She is singing Country Gardens and Rainbow Connection.  She is almost done with level 2 and almost ready to begin level 3.  I am excited with how well she is doing.  Bob did very well through the rough spots today.  He is happy with his progress too.  Basically it was a very nice musical day.

Tomorrow is one of my new students.  He is an adult male who will be taking voice lessons.  I have the books to copy for him.  I also will have the usual lesson with Charlie.  He is doing very well with his tenor saxophone too.  I must say at this time I am pleased with each of them.  All my students are working very hard at their music and work hard during lessons.  I love teaching.  For me, it is the best job in the world.  I really like it.

It has been a very good day today.  I am going to go and make some dinner now.  I think I feel like having some soup.  I really like soup.  It is one of the best foods ever.  I am rereading the Anne of Green Gables books.  I am on the 2nd book.  I love these books so much.  Mom originally bought them for me when I was a child and I just love them.  Hannah Muglia is also reading them too.  I think she will like them a lot.

I do hope your day is good too!  Have a great weekend!

A quiet Sunday

It started out as a bad day for me.  I got up late, again and I wanted to get up earlier because I don't like this new habit of sleeping in very late.  I have got to stop it.  Tomorrow I have a few things I want to do before teaching.  I need to decide what songs to copy for Ed and make a CD for him.  I also need to make some copies of music for my new one on Thursday too.  I want to get on top of this so that I have the music ready.  I don't have too many copies of the books left so I need to copy the music.  I should have done that for Amanda and Kayla, but I didn't.  I need to for the other Amanda and Koffi.  I have two adult male students that are starting and I only have 1 copy of guy songs so I have to copy them for the guys.

I emailed Richard when I was upset and crying.  He emailed me back right away.  He was reminding me to keep busy and not think about it too much.  To look forward, not backward, which is very Richard.  I called Kathy after I emailed Richard and by the time we were done, I was feeling much better.  I should have just called her.  She always makes me feel better.

I am feeling better now.  I think that I need to get busier and not sit around thinking too much.  I spend a lot of time on the computer because I don't have a lot to do.  I need to get off my butt and start working on the plan for the house.  January is 1/2 over and I haven't even started.  I only have a bit left of the month to make my plans.  I don't want to still be thinking about it in February.  I want to start working on my plan in February.  I want to have this house the way I want by summer.  Kathy and Tony are going to help me clear out the storage unit when the weather warms up in the spring.  I am thankful for that.  That is an expense I don't need plus I don't really need a storage unit.  I have a house that has lots of room.  We got it because we were going to move to Rochester near the store.  I shouldn't have ever got it, but I did and now I am sorry but I will get it closed soon.  Most of the stuff will be donated.  I am keeping a few things for myself and the rest is going.  I want the keyboard that in there and the pictures in the boxes.  There are few other boxes I need to keep from the store and a couple of other boxes but the rest is going.  A lot of the boxes, a good majority of them, are old reference books and stuff I don't need.  I am glad that I will be getting this gone and taken care of.

Tomorrow I am going to go in the family room and find the craft bags.  I am going to pick a kit out to make and start working on it tomorrow night.  I am going to stop playing around on the computer all night and do something productive.  I want to be more productive like I am used to.  I used to be busy all the time and I am want to do that again.  I did get my notebook out and it is on the counter.  I have everything ready to start my planning.  By the end of the month, I will know what I want done and where I want to start.  I want the house in order so that if Richard can come with the family for a visit I will have room for them.  I am hoping to see them this summer.  I haven't seen the family in 2 1/2 years and I miss the kids a lot.  They are growing up so fast.  I do hope to be able to see them more often soon.  We shall see if that is able to happen.  I am hoping by summer to be able to put a bit of money away for the plane fare to see them at least once a year if not twice.  I feel so far away from them.

Next week is shaping up to be a good week.  I have 4 lessons tomorrow plus I will have the music copied and put in the binder.  Tuesday, I have 2 lessons.  I have a new lesson on Thursday.  On Saturday, I have 4 lessons and I am going to see Peggy this weekend so all in all it is shaping up to be a good week.  I also have some house work I plan to get done too.  I think I have a plan to do some where it won't cause extra pain.  My goal is to get the vacuuming the carpets and the floor in the utility room, kitchen, and dining room.  I will be putting the paints away and cleaning up the corner that they were in since before Christmas.  I also need to completely clear the kitchen counter off.  I did most of the dining room table last week and I have mostly kept it up.  I want to go to Joann's and get a new Valentine themed table cloth too.  I like having table cloths that go with the season.  I think I am ready for that again.  I had table cloths that matched every season but they were donated.  I will change the table cloth and then put it in the closet upstairs for next fall.  I didn't need to buy Christmas ones because I have 2 that are very nice.  I just didn't put them out.  I never got to it.



With how things are turning out, I do feel like Momma is watching out for me.  Things have really come together for me since she passed away.  I needed new students to pay the bills and I got them.  I need some more and I am sure that I will get them.  So far, the new company is happy with me.  I have marked all my lessons in a timely manner and so far everything has gone very well.  I am not anticipating any problems.  Kayla will have her music by this weekend and I hope that Amanda will have hers ordered.  The other Amanda needs solo and ensemble choices so I will have them ready for her on Saturday.  She is an alto.  I am hoping I know where my young singer alto book is.  It can't be too far.  Fortunately, almost all of my music has been put away so I will find it easily.

Well, it is almost time for bed.  I am rather tired tonight.  Crying makes me very tired.  I hope tomorrow I will be less tired.  The cold is almost gone, thank goodness.  I have just a bit of it left.  I figure by the end of the week it will be completely gone.  I do hope you are doing well and are not sick at all.

fun Saturday

I had 2 lessons today!  Yes, 1 was new and a friend of the other student I had today.  I am excited about that.  Both girls did very well at their lessons.  They are 12 years old and are starting with the Italian Song, "Caro Mio Ben".  It is a nice introduction to classical music.  A beautiful piece of music.  They each also have a Broadway piece to learn too.  It was nice to have music through the house for a couple of hours.  Starting next Saturday, I will have 3 lessons each Saturday.  Every other Saturday, I will have 4, those are the weeks that Aggie is home.  I am so happy with how lessons are shaping up.  I still need some more lessons, but I am getting there, slowly.  God is working in my life and I can see it.  I am hopeful that I will have enough students to be okay by summer.  So far, so good.  I am glad about that.  I am busier now than I was and that is good.

After the lessons, I went to my usual, Tim Horton's and got my sandwich.  I was tired after the lesson, so I took a nap.  I am so tired all the time right now, more than usual.  The fatigue is sometimes really bad.  I think I have napped more in this last two weeks than I have for a long time.  I am just so tired all the time.  I don't know if the change of pain medicine has made a difference or not.  It's hard to say.  My cold is almost over.  I hope it leaves rather quick, like tomorrow!  Two weeks of this is more than enough, I think.  I hope the rest of my family is getting better too.  I know that Maia's family and Tillie are all ill too.  Michelle is sick again this week.  She had it last weekend too, but she has it again.  I am hoping that Maia is healthy enough to go to a movie this week.  If I don't seen the Narnia in the movie theatre that is okay, I will get it on DVD.  I also want to see the Harry Potter movie again while it is in the theatres, but there again, if I don't, that is okay.  I was very sad when I saw Harry Potter so I can't really say I enjoyed it as I usually would.  It is hard to like things when you are sad, but how else can I be right now?  I am sad most of the time.  I am a bit better when I am with people or teaching so I think I am doing pretty good right now.

I am not sure if I am meeting Donna tomorrow or not.  I have to give her a call to find out.  It will be a quiet day tomorrow if I don't.  I don't mind.  My quiet days are getting less and less which is exactly what I want.  I would like to be busy during the week and then rest on Sundays.  That is my goal.  I now have lessons on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.  In February, I will have lessons again on Wednesday as well.  Basically, my weeks are shaping up nicely.  I like teaching at home.  I find it much more relaxing than going to people's houses.  i was always nervous about being on time or late, did I bring the music I need?  Stuff like that.  Here, I have the music I need and I am always on time because I am already home.  I love how the living room is set up for teaching.  I will have everything ready for the week tomorrow.

It has been a good day despite being so exhausted.  I hope this extra exhaustion goes away soon.  I hope your day was as good as mine.  I love my new students and my old students.  They are all super awesome!

Friday

I talked to the two new students today.  I like to call right away so I can introduce myself to them.  This way I can let the moms know that the students need to bring a blank notebook and that there will be a few books to purchase.  I am excited about any new students I get.

I got a letter from the social services.  I have to send some info to them by next week.  It won't be a problem.  I will copy the stuff this weekend and put it in the drop box.  I will have some help.  I hope by summer I won't need the extra help and that I will be standing on my own two feet.  That is what I pray for every night.  So far, it is okay.  I am doing okay.  I did do something brainless this week.  I have been meaning to pay the phone bill for a week now.  I kept putting it off and so today I go to make a call only to discover the phone has been cut off temporarily.  So I went and paid the bill.   I am annoyed at myself because there is a $15 fee to reconnect the phone.  Wasted money because I procrastinated on paying the phone bill.  I am very annoyed over this.  I can't afford to do things like this.  Every dime counts just like it does for so many people that I know.  The one thing that is comforting to me is that so many of my friends are in the same position that I am in.  That is a big comfort to me.  I know that I am not alone and so much of the time I feel alone now.  I can't really say I feel lonely, because I don't think I am.  I have many times during the week where I see people.  I am lonely for Mom.  I miss her and her constant companionship.  I am getting used to being by myself.  It isn't so bad anymore.  I still miss her, but I think I always will.  I don't think that will change.  From what my friends say who have lost their moms, they still miss them so I think I always will.  Anne says it just gets a bit more bearable.  Somedays, it is bearable and other days it is not.

My cold is still lingering on.  From what I have heard, most of my family is ill with flues and colds.  My Uncle Ken has pneumonia and is slowly getting better.  Audrey was taking care of him and became ill herself.  My Uncle John and his family all had the flu.  Maia and her family have the flu and colds, so it is all over our family.  I do hope that Maia and Tillie are feeling better for next week and come for a visit.  I haven't had company since Thanksgiving and I am ready for some.  We aren't planning any work to do, just a visit.  I am not doing anything this month but making plans for what needs to be done.  I ordered another welcome mat last night.  I need one more because they aren't as big as the old ones we had.  With this one, it will cover much of the tile and then the tile will be protected which is my goal.  I don't want the tile to be messed up by salt or snow.  It is in really good shape and I want it to stay that way.  I am sorry that the rugs got donated and not put away for this year.  A little late now.  Eventually I will need mats for the other two doors too.  If I can, I will get some rugs in the spring from Target.  Right now they are very expensive so it is on the want list not the need list.  Maybe I will get lucky and find some at the thrift store.  Hard to say.  I haven't gone in to see if they have any yet because it just isn't a necessary right now.

I have to go and pull some music for Amanda tomorrow.  I have the Broadway book in the living room ready, I just need to pull the Italian book for her.  Kayla should be returning hers tomorrow because her books should have come in this week.  Thank goodness I have 5 copies of the Italian book.  I will need to make more copies of the CD though.  That isn't a problem as I have plenty of blank CDs available.  I am glad I have teaching stuff I need to do.  It keeps me busy and productive.  I am happier when I teach although I am still rather sad most of the time.  I figure it will be a long time before I am happy all the time again.

Lily won the spelling bee in her school today!  I am so proud of her.  She is an amazing young lady and very smart.

I do hope you have had a good day too.  So far it has been alright.  Nothing to exciting other than paying the phone bill.  I do feel good when I pay a bill for some reason.  It makes me feel good when I can pay a bill.