I am so tired today. I think I have slept through most of it. I have had a bad headache all day so for today. After Army Wives, I will be heading back to bed again. I haven't even gotten out of my pajamas yet for the day. Exhaustion just hit me this afternoon like I haven't had it in a few weeks. I got up late and then after a couple of hours, I went right back to bed.
Tomorrow I have to get up because, I get my MUGLIA GIRLS!!! I haven't seen then in 6 WEEKS! Way too long. I am excited that I get them tomorrow. I need to see my girls much more often than I get them. They just can't have lessons more than once a month but I am thankful I see them that often.
Bob will be having his lesson on Wednesday. I have my blood test that day too. Yuck, at least I haven't had one for a month.
It has been an all around yucky day for me, I think. It is a really bad missing Mom day. The short time I have been up I have been crying and missing her. I just want her with me. My friends, Rosemary and Kimberly are just starting the grieving journey and I know how much it sucks. At least they have each other and their families. I have friends and that has helped a lot but I still just want to be with my mom. That hasn't changed since she died, I don't really expect it to ever change.
I called and asked Tillie what she was doing for mother's day, she is going to Darrin's I guess. Last year she was alone so I was going to ask her to go to dinner, but I guess I will be the one alone on that horrible day. I don't look forward to that day not one bit. Maybe i will just hide that day and it will pass me by. That might be what I have to do. Last year, I took Momma to Olive Garden and we had a good time. Now she isn't here. I was going to go to her grave site, but I didn't want to go alone and Andrew isn't going so I guess I am not. It is a long drive to go by myself. It is about 2 hours away. Andrew is graduating on the 17th of June as of right now. It is on a Friday, which is kind of strange but okay, I will just reschedule lessons for that day. As it gets closer I will check the date again with him. These dates have been to change. I do know he is planning some sort of party too but I don't know much about that either.
I hope your day is better than mine. Army Wives is on now so I am going to watch it.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Saturday, April 30, 2011
what a day
I got up early to go to Irwin's funeral Mass. I sat with the Hubels, friends and neighbors. Rosemary was holding up pretty well. It was a nice service with nice music. The one thing I do like about the Catholic Mass is how much music is involved even in prayers. Being Methodist, we have our hymns and praise music, but we don't sing prayers and I thought that was pretty cool. I have only attend a couple of Mass services in my life so it is always a surprise for me. I did tear up a bit which I expected as Irv was a good friend to Mom and I. I sat with an old friend from High School at the luncheon. I didn't even know she was there. Her name was Julie Hoffman Moses, she married a classmate of ours too. I asked her if she was going to the reunion and she didn't know anything about it so I told her as much as I could. I gave her my email address so hopefully she will email me and be able to attend the reunion. I have my ticket. My friend, Laura, gave it to me as I can't afford the ticket price. With limited income, I just didn't see how I could afford it now that I am on my own, so I inquired about lower price tickets for people like me and she had an extra ticket so she gave it to me. I am so thankful for that. I am looking forward to it.
Anyways, it was really nice to catch up with Julie as I haven't seen her since graduation although we used to live a street away from each other. I also sat with the Hubels. They are such a nice and neighborly family. When I needed someone to stay with the little Mom while I went grocery shopping, their daughter Carolyn came to stay with Mom. Mom liked her. Sometimes Carolyn could even get Mom to finish an ensure! Those were good days for sure. I sorely miss her so much. I expected the funeral to be a bit harder, but outside of Julie's parents telling me they were sorry to hear about Mom, I did pretty well.
This afternoon I was thinking about funerals in general. You know as a Christian, I am supposed to be happy that a person is home with God. All the scripture says so (the ones they read at both Mom's and Irv's funerals). We are supposed to rejoice that they have been called home. Yet, they are the saddest things ever. How can we rejoice and be sad at the same time. On one hand, I am so glad Mom is not in any pain and doesn't have Alzheimer's anymore, but on the other hand, I have never been so sad in my life. This sadness surpasses even when I was a teenager and thought the world was a horrible place. I am trying to be happy that Mom is in a better place, she is with God and what could be better than that for her? Nothing, but for me, it is the worst thing that EVER happened to me. Selfishly, I want Mom with me, despite her Alzheimer's and I know that is not best for her but it would be good for me. It makes me feel bad because I want her back and I know that she was not doing well at the end, but I still want her back. Yes, I am aware that it won't happen, but it doesn't mean that I don't want her back. I know that is selfish, but sometimes I can't help being selfish. It isn't all the time, just most of it. How can I settle the selfish part of me to be happy she is with God? I have no idea. I just know that I miss her more now than I did when she first passed away. I think it is because when it first happened, I had family all around me so it wasn't like it was real, then when they went home it became real. Now I have been alone for about 4 months now and it is so real. Before, it was like a dream. If I closed my eyes I could see her and talk to her. Tillie was here, Maia was here, Richard was here, Cathy was here, and Kathy was here, now it is just me. I don't mind it so much. I like living in the house even though I am alone. I am not as scared as I was when I lost mom, I no longer want to live with Richard out of fear. I would like to see him more, but he lives so far away from me. I know I can pay my bills and stuff so I am not as scared as I was. I do still get nervous by the end of the month if there are any bills left over, like there are a couple this month but they will get paid.
Overall, I think I am doing pretty well, despite being so sad most of the time. I am enjoying teaching and being with my friends when I am. Teaching is going well despite the fact the a lot of the students from the new company don't last. This is a problem I have never had, but I live farther away than I guess the students' and the student's parents realize. That is okay though, I am doing okay.
I hope this finds you doing well and enjoying the last day of April! Tomorrow is May Day, one of Mom and I's favorite day.
Anyways, it was really nice to catch up with Julie as I haven't seen her since graduation although we used to live a street away from each other. I also sat with the Hubels. They are such a nice and neighborly family. When I needed someone to stay with the little Mom while I went grocery shopping, their daughter Carolyn came to stay with Mom. Mom liked her. Sometimes Carolyn could even get Mom to finish an ensure! Those were good days for sure. I sorely miss her so much. I expected the funeral to be a bit harder, but outside of Julie's parents telling me they were sorry to hear about Mom, I did pretty well.
This afternoon I was thinking about funerals in general. You know as a Christian, I am supposed to be happy that a person is home with God. All the scripture says so (the ones they read at both Mom's and Irv's funerals). We are supposed to rejoice that they have been called home. Yet, they are the saddest things ever. How can we rejoice and be sad at the same time. On one hand, I am so glad Mom is not in any pain and doesn't have Alzheimer's anymore, but on the other hand, I have never been so sad in my life. This sadness surpasses even when I was a teenager and thought the world was a horrible place. I am trying to be happy that Mom is in a better place, she is with God and what could be better than that for her? Nothing, but for me, it is the worst thing that EVER happened to me. Selfishly, I want Mom with me, despite her Alzheimer's and I know that is not best for her but it would be good for me. It makes me feel bad because I want her back and I know that she was not doing well at the end, but I still want her back. Yes, I am aware that it won't happen, but it doesn't mean that I don't want her back. I know that is selfish, but sometimes I can't help being selfish. It isn't all the time, just most of it. How can I settle the selfish part of me to be happy she is with God? I have no idea. I just know that I miss her more now than I did when she first passed away. I think it is because when it first happened, I had family all around me so it wasn't like it was real, then when they went home it became real. Now I have been alone for about 4 months now and it is so real. Before, it was like a dream. If I closed my eyes I could see her and talk to her. Tillie was here, Maia was here, Richard was here, Cathy was here, and Kathy was here, now it is just me. I don't mind it so much. I like living in the house even though I am alone. I am not as scared as I was when I lost mom, I no longer want to live with Richard out of fear. I would like to see him more, but he lives so far away from me. I know I can pay my bills and stuff so I am not as scared as I was. I do still get nervous by the end of the month if there are any bills left over, like there are a couple this month but they will get paid.
Overall, I think I am doing pretty well, despite being so sad most of the time. I am enjoying teaching and being with my friends when I am. Teaching is going well despite the fact the a lot of the students from the new company don't last. This is a problem I have never had, but I live farther away than I guess the students' and the student's parents realize. That is okay though, I am doing okay.
I hope this finds you doing well and enjoying the last day of April! Tomorrow is May Day, one of Mom and I's favorite day.
Friday, April 29, 2011
royal wedding day
Yes, I confess, I am a Royal Family Watcher. It could be because I am 1/2 British. My father was from England and both sides of my family go back to England and then Scotland. We are definitely a Celtic family. There is also Native Canadian in us from my Great Grandmother's side. I did NOT get anything from the Native side, Richard did, but I am all Celtic from the pasty, pale white skin to the almost black hair. I actually don't mind my skin as it does sometimes look nice (usually helps if I have make up on). I try to stay out of the sun since I burn so very easy.
I wanted to get up early to watch the wedding, but I finally fell asleep around 4 am so I missed it. I went to get my hair done. I have decided that I should get it done 2 times a week since I don't like droopy bangs and by today, they were droopy. I went to the viewing of Irv, my friend, this afternoon. I talked to Rosemary and to her daughter, Kimberly. Kimberly used to babysit me when I was young. She was a great babysitter. Charlie had his lesson today as well as Acer and Calli. I have been watching all about the wedding since after the lessons. I plan to watch the special with Barbara Walters at 9 pm. The pictures of the wedding are simply beautiful! I love her dress. It was so simple, yet so elegant. I have a few plates, thimbles, and cups that have the Queen and the Queen Mother on them. Some were Mom's and some are mine. I do not plan to ever give those up. Mom was an aide for the Lieutenant Governor of Ontario and a few times she was his aide when the Queen and the Queen Mother were in Toronto. Those were such special times for me to remember. I remember mom and I standing where the press were in front of the ropes for the Queen's walk about. I think I took a whole roll of film myself of the Queen, same when the Queen Mother came to Toronto. It was just really neat some of the things we were lucky enough to do because of mom's work.
Part of me dreads the funeral tomorrow. The viewing wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. I expected it to be harder. It is so hard when someone you know passes away. It did bring back some memories and feelings of when Mom passed away but not as much as I thought. We shall see how I do tomorrow. I talked to Kimberly today when I was there. She was doing alright when I spoke to her but I know how that can change in a moment. I remember that much from the fog of Mom's passing.
Acer and Calli did pretty well for their lessons today. Acer is so creative that getting him to sit down to play his assigned songs can be a challenge but we got it done. He is playing a Chinese Song that he learned in school and he figured it out on the piano. We also played a game today. He has perfect pitch. Yup, 6 years old and has perfect pitch. He got every note I played perfectly right including the sharps and flats. Amazing young man he is. Traditional lessons are not really something he and I really do. We do a mix. Calli is doing very well too. She is in level 3 now and starting to play some pretty complicated pieces. She hasn't decided how many pieces she will sing at the concert. That is fine as we have 3 weeks until the concert so we have plenty of time to decide. Acer will sing 2 pieces, 1 with his sister and 1 by himself and his drum. It should be very cool. He now has some videos about drums that answers questions about piano and drums. They are very cute. He also mentions that he practices drums all the time. He says it is very important. I love the videos. He has 5 of them so far.
I have a bit more of a headache than usual, but I am not surprised with how my day went. I expect one again tomorrow. I hope I am wrong, but I doubt it. Tomorrow will be stressful as funerals often are. It is just so sad because he was a good man, and it was unexpected. I fully expected him to recover from the pneumonia he had. I didn't know about the leukemia. They couldn't do anything about it because he was too weak to get it so basically, there wasn't anything they could do for him. The only thing we can do is pray for the family.
I wanted to get up early to watch the wedding, but I finally fell asleep around 4 am so I missed it. I went to get my hair done. I have decided that I should get it done 2 times a week since I don't like droopy bangs and by today, they were droopy. I went to the viewing of Irv, my friend, this afternoon. I talked to Rosemary and to her daughter, Kimberly. Kimberly used to babysit me when I was young. She was a great babysitter. Charlie had his lesson today as well as Acer and Calli. I have been watching all about the wedding since after the lessons. I plan to watch the special with Barbara Walters at 9 pm. The pictures of the wedding are simply beautiful! I love her dress. It was so simple, yet so elegant. I have a few plates, thimbles, and cups that have the Queen and the Queen Mother on them. Some were Mom's and some are mine. I do not plan to ever give those up. Mom was an aide for the Lieutenant Governor of Ontario and a few times she was his aide when the Queen and the Queen Mother were in Toronto. Those were such special times for me to remember. I remember mom and I standing where the press were in front of the ropes for the Queen's walk about. I think I took a whole roll of film myself of the Queen, same when the Queen Mother came to Toronto. It was just really neat some of the things we were lucky enough to do because of mom's work.
Part of me dreads the funeral tomorrow. The viewing wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. I expected it to be harder. It is so hard when someone you know passes away. It did bring back some memories and feelings of when Mom passed away but not as much as I thought. We shall see how I do tomorrow. I talked to Kimberly today when I was there. She was doing alright when I spoke to her but I know how that can change in a moment. I remember that much from the fog of Mom's passing.
Acer and Calli did pretty well for their lessons today. Acer is so creative that getting him to sit down to play his assigned songs can be a challenge but we got it done. He is playing a Chinese Song that he learned in school and he figured it out on the piano. We also played a game today. He has perfect pitch. Yup, 6 years old and has perfect pitch. He got every note I played perfectly right including the sharps and flats. Amazing young man he is. Traditional lessons are not really something he and I really do. We do a mix. Calli is doing very well too. She is in level 3 now and starting to play some pretty complicated pieces. She hasn't decided how many pieces she will sing at the concert. That is fine as we have 3 weeks until the concert so we have plenty of time to decide. Acer will sing 2 pieces, 1 with his sister and 1 by himself and his drum. It should be very cool. He now has some videos about drums that answers questions about piano and drums. They are very cute. He also mentions that he practices drums all the time. He says it is very important. I love the videos. He has 5 of them so far.
I have a bit more of a headache than usual, but I am not surprised with how my day went. I expect one again tomorrow. I hope I am wrong, but I doubt it. Tomorrow will be stressful as funerals often are. It is just so sad because he was a good man, and it was unexpected. I fully expected him to recover from the pneumonia he had. I didn't know about the leukemia. They couldn't do anything about it because he was too weak to get it so basically, there wasn't anything they could do for him. The only thing we can do is pray for the family.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Thursday
Well, it is another no lesson day today. My poor Breanna broke out in hives around 1 am this morning. She had an allergic reaction to some medicine she has been taking however, she is just not up to a lesson today. I was supposed to have Christine's lesson tonight, but as I had a feeling, she cancelled her lesson. She is also stopping lessons for the summer. What? I know, it isn't even summer but I had a feeling when she started last month she wouldn't last because of the distance to my house. It took her longer to get here than she thought. Her mom commented on that when she first came for the first lesson.
I do have a new student starting from the new company. However, she is an adult so I am aprehensive as whether or not she will last. The track record for the other adult students at the new company is zero so it is wait and see mode for me. She is interested in trying out for community theatre so I am hopeful she will last longer than the one month that they pay in advanced. I really am hoping that is for sure. I love working with people who want to audition in community theatre because it is great to have such a good goal and I know of several theatres that are wonderful. They put on great productions.
I am very, very exhausted again today. I tried to take a nap but the phone woke me and I couldn't sleep any longer. I am hopeful that I will sleep okay tonight. I am getting up early tomorrow to go and see a movie with Lily. That will be fun. We are going to see Soul Surfer. It looks good so I am pleased with her choice. I am picking her up at 9:30 in the morning. I think we will stop and get breakfast before the movie as it doesn't start until 10:55. I have Charlie's lesson at 3 pm and then the regular lessons for Acer and Calli. I also need to have my hair done sometime in there. Should that not get done, I will get my hair done on Saturday so that is fine, either way will work with me. I have decided, though, I will get it done twice a week because once a week my bangs droop and I don't like droopy bangs. I like fluffy, perky bangs.
I am kind of bored right now because I was planning to have lessons and they aren't happening today. I look forward to having lessons tomorrow and seeing Breanna next week. She is such a good student as most of mine are.
I do hope we aren't going to get the bad weather than many others are getting. Way too much bad weather this spring so far. We are supposed to get more storms this week and weekend. Ugh, I am not enjoying this weather so far. I do hope you and your family are safe from this weather. The weatherman is on right now, 166 tornados yesterday. Wow, that is awful. We had flooding all around us but we have been spared so far. More storms on Sunday here.
Pain level is okay, nothing to serious here just the usual amount. It is a missing mom bad day though as I have been alone all day today. I am very tired and I am hoping to head for bed early as I am getting up early. I do hope you are having a good day.
I do have a new student starting from the new company. However, she is an adult so I am aprehensive as whether or not she will last. The track record for the other adult students at the new company is zero so it is wait and see mode for me. She is interested in trying out for community theatre so I am hopeful she will last longer than the one month that they pay in advanced. I really am hoping that is for sure. I love working with people who want to audition in community theatre because it is great to have such a good goal and I know of several theatres that are wonderful. They put on great productions.
I am very, very exhausted again today. I tried to take a nap but the phone woke me and I couldn't sleep any longer. I am hopeful that I will sleep okay tonight. I am getting up early tomorrow to go and see a movie with Lily. That will be fun. We are going to see Soul Surfer. It looks good so I am pleased with her choice. I am picking her up at 9:30 in the morning. I think we will stop and get breakfast before the movie as it doesn't start until 10:55. I have Charlie's lesson at 3 pm and then the regular lessons for Acer and Calli. I also need to have my hair done sometime in there. Should that not get done, I will get my hair done on Saturday so that is fine, either way will work with me. I have decided, though, I will get it done twice a week because once a week my bangs droop and I don't like droopy bangs. I like fluffy, perky bangs.
I am kind of bored right now because I was planning to have lessons and they aren't happening today. I look forward to having lessons tomorrow and seeing Breanna next week. She is such a good student as most of mine are.
I do hope we aren't going to get the bad weather than many others are getting. Way too much bad weather this spring so far. We are supposed to get more storms this week and weekend. Ugh, I am not enjoying this weather so far. I do hope you and your family are safe from this weather. The weatherman is on right now, 166 tornados yesterday. Wow, that is awful. We had flooding all around us but we have been spared so far. More storms on Sunday here.
Pain level is okay, nothing to serious here just the usual amount. It is a missing mom bad day though as I have been alone all day today. I am very tired and I am hoping to head for bed early as I am getting up early. I do hope you are having a good day.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
midweek
It's Wednesday again! I had Carson for his lessons. He just started piano today. I am pleased with his first piano lesson. He is doing well with singing. Amanda had her make up lesson today. She will have her regularly schedule lesson on Saturday. She is doing very well. She started My Heart Will Go On today. I don't have the accompaniment for it so she will need to get it. I tried to get it off the Internet but I am just really bad at the technological type stuff.
I just got a call from a good friend/neighbor of mine. Mom and I's good friend, Irv, died this afternoon. Oh my, I can't even imagine what his wife is going through. I know how bad it is. One of his sons is on the plane on the way here. He doesn't know that his father died. I know how heart breaking this is. When I lost Mom I thought my heart was going to go with her. This reminds me so much of losing Mom. It is tough to lose your parent, and for Rosemary, it is tough to lose your husband. I just can't even imagine. Barbara Jean will keep me posted with the details. I don't know if I am strong enough to go to another funeral, but I will because they were dear friends of ours and they came to mom's.
I am extra tired today for some reason. I don't really know why. I think the rainy weather earlier made a difference. I will be heading for bed somewhat early tonight. Friday I will be going to a movie with Lily. We are going to the early showing because she is picking up her friend from school to spend the night at her house. I think her friend is spending the night both Friday and Saturday. That will be fun for her. We are going to see Soul Surfer. It looks very good. At least this is the plan today unless something happens with the planning for Irv. Sometimes these things move fast. We shall see. I know with Mom we could have had something right away but that was bad for Richard so we waited until the Friday and Saturday.
I had an okay day until the phone call. Now I am having a sad day. I feel so sad for Rosemary and her children. Losing a person you love is so hard. I hope your day is better than ours. Please pray for my dear friend, Rosemary and her family. I will be.
I just got a call from a good friend/neighbor of mine. Mom and I's good friend, Irv, died this afternoon. Oh my, I can't even imagine what his wife is going through. I know how bad it is. One of his sons is on the plane on the way here. He doesn't know that his father died. I know how heart breaking this is. When I lost Mom I thought my heart was going to go with her. This reminds me so much of losing Mom. It is tough to lose your parent, and for Rosemary, it is tough to lose your husband. I just can't even imagine. Barbara Jean will keep me posted with the details. I don't know if I am strong enough to go to another funeral, but I will because they were dear friends of ours and they came to mom's.
I am extra tired today for some reason. I don't really know why. I think the rainy weather earlier made a difference. I will be heading for bed somewhat early tonight. Friday I will be going to a movie with Lily. We are going to the early showing because she is picking up her friend from school to spend the night at her house. I think her friend is spending the night both Friday and Saturday. That will be fun for her. We are going to see Soul Surfer. It looks very good. At least this is the plan today unless something happens with the planning for Irv. Sometimes these things move fast. We shall see. I know with Mom we could have had something right away but that was bad for Richard so we waited until the Friday and Saturday.
I had an okay day until the phone call. Now I am having a sad day. I feel so sad for Rosemary and her children. Losing a person you love is so hard. I hope your day is better than ours. Please pray for my dear friend, Rosemary and her family. I will be.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
no lessons day
I received a phone call a while ago from Rick, my student. He is stuck at work and will not be able to have a lesson tonight. I am bummed about that but what can I do. He will be gone until May 18 when he will resume his lessons. Charlie will have his lesson on Friday instead of tonight because of a school event. I am so thankful he makes up lessons. He rarely misses a lesson, he prefers to make them up. What a great student.
I am very tired this afternoon. I did take a brief nap. I just couldn't stay awake anymore. Right after I got up is when Rick called to cancel lessons. I am just relaxing this afternoon. I have things I could do, but I just don't feel like it. I have some pictures to look at this afternoon. One of the photo albums I rescued in November does indeed have family pictures in it. Yup, good pictures would have been thrown away. Not good. This is why I must be present when stuff is going through. I just have to. Too much has been thrown away or donated that should have been kept. Thankfully, it seems that they have no interest in doing anymore in my house. I am grateful for that. I want to know what exactly I have and I will decide what I do or don't want. I don't need someone to decide for me. I have had too much decided for me and I need to take control.
It is suppose to rain for the next few days again. Ugh, that means I won't be able to go the storage unit and get more stuff out. Maybe in between showers will work. I guess I will find out depending on the weather. Right now the weather is just humid and warm but the storms are heading here. We are under a tornado watch until 10 pm. Yuck, fortunately, it has been a very long time since we actually had a tornado here. We did have some damage about 2 miles north of me last year from a really bad storm. I hope the storms pass us by without any damage.
Pain is a bit more in the arms today then normal. I don't really know why except the weather is not nice for pain but it is rare that my arms hurt, both of them. My head is normal, thank goodness. It is a more than normal missing Mom day. She is on my mind a lot today. I just miss her so much all the time and today more than usual.
I do hope you are having a good day.
I am very tired this afternoon. I did take a brief nap. I just couldn't stay awake anymore. Right after I got up is when Rick called to cancel lessons. I am just relaxing this afternoon. I have things I could do, but I just don't feel like it. I have some pictures to look at this afternoon. One of the photo albums I rescued in November does indeed have family pictures in it. Yup, good pictures would have been thrown away. Not good. This is why I must be present when stuff is going through. I just have to. Too much has been thrown away or donated that should have been kept. Thankfully, it seems that they have no interest in doing anymore in my house. I am grateful for that. I want to know what exactly I have and I will decide what I do or don't want. I don't need someone to decide for me. I have had too much decided for me and I need to take control.
It is suppose to rain for the next few days again. Ugh, that means I won't be able to go the storage unit and get more stuff out. Maybe in between showers will work. I guess I will find out depending on the weather. Right now the weather is just humid and warm but the storms are heading here. We are under a tornado watch until 10 pm. Yuck, fortunately, it has been a very long time since we actually had a tornado here. We did have some damage about 2 miles north of me last year from a really bad storm. I hope the storms pass us by without any damage.
Pain is a bit more in the arms today then normal. I don't really know why except the weather is not nice for pain but it is rare that my arms hurt, both of them. My head is normal, thank goodness. It is a more than normal missing Mom day. She is on my mind a lot today. I just miss her so much all the time and today more than usual.
I do hope you are having a good day.
Monday, April 25, 2011
musings for the day
Easter was a good time (even with the 3 hour little nap). Unfortunately, I still am having trouble sleeping between the hours of 2 am and 5 am. If I am asleep before that then that is a good night, but I often wake up around that time and then I can't go back to sleep. It is fear that is keeping me awake. We live in a safe neighborhood, we have been lucky enough not to have a break in in many, many years. I think I was very young the last time and it was neighbor children who were doing. Every little noise in the house just stabs fear in me between those hours. I don't know why. It is just those hours. I need to fix this and I don't know how. I am open to suggestions! I have every door blocked (2 of them have the recycle boxes in front of them mainly for lack of a better place to keep them) the other is blocked only at night. It isn't like I expect a break in, it is just I have never lived by myself before. This is really cramping my sleep and I have a hard time sleeping in the first place because of pain. I have done things to secure the house as best as I can. I know I am partially deaf, but I can hear enough to know if someone were in the house or not. If someone spends the night, I sleep pretty well and am not in fear.
Anyways, outside of that major issue, I am doing alright today. (During the day, I am fine, it is the night that gets me) I had a good day yesterday. I got to see Kathy both Saturday and Sunday so that was the best. I got good hugs from her little ones. The girls are very good huggers. Today is just 2 lessons. I am hoping that by fall I will have more but that is still 4 months away. I can't wait for May! Less rain! More sunshine!!
Gas is getting really high again. The last time this happened we lost the store. I do hope I don't lose anymore students like I did back then. I will be in a big pickle if I lose any students. I am thankful I don't drive very far. I do need to get gas tomorrow though as it is less than a 1/4 tank and I don't like it below 1/2 tank. My trip to Belle River used a 1/4 tank of gas.
We are getting much rain today. Since I am spending the day inside, I don't mind. Apparently, it will rain again tomorrow with 50 degree temperatures. Boy the news is not so good. I usually only watch the 7 pm one but I was watching Oprah. I don't always watch that show, but when I remember I like the show.
I have Army Wives info on my facebook. I love that show (apparently so do some of you!) There will be a new episode next Sunday, thank goodness! I have to eventually watch the entire season 4 that I have on DVD. Yes, I have skipped season 4, not because I won't like it, I know I will, I just haven't been able to remember to watch it when i have time. I also love the shows NCIS! They are soooooo good too! That is about the most of the TV shows that I am addicted to. I do like Dancing with the Stars but if I miss it, it isn't the end of the world. Plus, I never get to see the results show because it is on at the same time as NCIS.
anyways, it has been a good day. I just have my Emily for her lesson later this evening. She is such a cutie!!! I do hope you are having a good day too!
Anyways, outside of that major issue, I am doing alright today. (During the day, I am fine, it is the night that gets me) I had a good day yesterday. I got to see Kathy both Saturday and Sunday so that was the best. I got good hugs from her little ones. The girls are very good huggers. Today is just 2 lessons. I am hoping that by fall I will have more but that is still 4 months away. I can't wait for May! Less rain! More sunshine!!
Gas is getting really high again. The last time this happened we lost the store. I do hope I don't lose anymore students like I did back then. I will be in a big pickle if I lose any students. I am thankful I don't drive very far. I do need to get gas tomorrow though as it is less than a 1/4 tank and I don't like it below 1/2 tank. My trip to Belle River used a 1/4 tank of gas.
We are getting much rain today. Since I am spending the day inside, I don't mind. Apparently, it will rain again tomorrow with 50 degree temperatures. Boy the news is not so good. I usually only watch the 7 pm one but I was watching Oprah. I don't always watch that show, but when I remember I like the show.
I have Army Wives info on my facebook. I love that show (apparently so do some of you!) There will be a new episode next Sunday, thank goodness! I have to eventually watch the entire season 4 that I have on DVD. Yes, I have skipped season 4, not because I won't like it, I know I will, I just haven't been able to remember to watch it when i have time. I also love the shows NCIS! They are soooooo good too! That is about the most of the TV shows that I am addicted to. I do like Dancing with the Stars but if I miss it, it isn't the end of the world. Plus, I never get to see the results show because it is on at the same time as NCIS.
anyways, it has been a good day. I just have my Emily for her lesson later this evening. She is such a cutie!!! I do hope you are having a good day too!
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Happy Easter!!!
I went to Kathy's Parents for the afternoon. Boy was it fun. I had gotten her children some Easter treats and the best part, there is none left for me! Since I didn't want temptation, I am so glad it worked out perfectly that there were no candies left! I have enough junk food in the house that I don't need anything else. Her girls were dressed in their Easter dresses that Samantha had picked out for the girls. She is definitely going to be a fashion girl! The dresses were really cute. Samantha did a great job picking them out. Samantha went and changed shortly after I got there.
Dinner was soooooo good. I have to say that Mrs. Knight out did herself as usual. She is a good cook that is all I have to say about it. I am glad I went. When I got home I took a little (3 hour) nap. I have been so tired lately again, more than usual. I don't know why. I suppose it could be the new medicine. I am so thankful that I can sleep in tomorrow! That might be the problem for the last few days because I have had to be up early for the last 4 days, although, I would get up early everyday for these type events no problem! Anytime I get to hang out with Kathy, is a great day plus my students, I mean, how cool is that? Very.
Tomorrow will be a regular day. I will have 2 lessons for the day. Bob and Emily. I told Aggie all about Emily. She is anxious to meet her and her parents.
Kathy is looking at their schedule to see when they can come and clear out the storage unit. I am hopeful we can do it in one day since I will be going every few days to organize what I want and what I don't. There isn't much that I want so that is okay. There are some boxes for the business I need to keep and a few other boxes, other than that, I want my keyboard that is in there and the rest can go. I don't want anything else. I will get a few boxes tomorrow. There are a couple of boxes of writing books in there too at least I think they are in there. I will find out tomorrow when I go. I plan to get about 6 boxes tomorrow and then 6 more each trip until I have what I want out of the unit.
It has been a medium pain day so that is normal. My head is the normal pain today. I am just more tired than usual. There is no Army Wives on tonight either. I am rather disappointed as I love that show. I have movies I do need to watch, Narnia, Harry Potter, Tangled. I watched the Barbie movie of Rapunzel today. It was really cute. Samantha and Alicia got it for Easter today. They are really cute movies. Even Jake was watching although he would not admit it. It was pretty funny to watch him watch the movie casually, like he just happened to be in the room and not really watching the movie. Matthew wasn't even in the room while that movie was playing. I wasn't surprised on that. He was down in the basement playing video games or something like that. After the Barbie movie we started watching Singing in the Rain. We all love that movie. The girls, Kathy, her parents, Jake, and I that is. Matthew does not like that movie so he was not happy to have to be upstairs for a few minutes before we left. We all left about 3 pm. I came home and went right to bed, I was so exhausted.
All in all, it was a great day, a really good day.
Dinner was soooooo good. I have to say that Mrs. Knight out did herself as usual. She is a good cook that is all I have to say about it. I am glad I went. When I got home I took a little (3 hour) nap. I have been so tired lately again, more than usual. I don't know why. I suppose it could be the new medicine. I am so thankful that I can sleep in tomorrow! That might be the problem for the last few days because I have had to be up early for the last 4 days, although, I would get up early everyday for these type events no problem! Anytime I get to hang out with Kathy, is a great day plus my students, I mean, how cool is that? Very.
Tomorrow will be a regular day. I will have 2 lessons for the day. Bob and Emily. I told Aggie all about Emily. She is anxious to meet her and her parents.
Kathy is looking at their schedule to see when they can come and clear out the storage unit. I am hopeful we can do it in one day since I will be going every few days to organize what I want and what I don't. There isn't much that I want so that is okay. There are some boxes for the business I need to keep and a few other boxes, other than that, I want my keyboard that is in there and the rest can go. I don't want anything else. I will get a few boxes tomorrow. There are a couple of boxes of writing books in there too at least I think they are in there. I will find out tomorrow when I go. I plan to get about 6 boxes tomorrow and then 6 more each trip until I have what I want out of the unit.
It has been a medium pain day so that is normal. My head is the normal pain today. I am just more tired than usual. There is no Army Wives on tonight either. I am rather disappointed as I love that show. I have movies I do need to watch, Narnia, Harry Potter, Tangled. I watched the Barbie movie of Rapunzel today. It was really cute. Samantha and Alicia got it for Easter today. They are really cute movies. Even Jake was watching although he would not admit it. It was pretty funny to watch him watch the movie casually, like he just happened to be in the room and not really watching the movie. Matthew wasn't even in the room while that movie was playing. I wasn't surprised on that. He was down in the basement playing video games or something like that. After the Barbie movie we started watching Singing in the Rain. We all love that movie. The girls, Kathy, her parents, Jake, and I that is. Matthew does not like that movie so he was not happy to have to be upstairs for a few minutes before we left. We all left about 3 pm. I came home and went right to bed, I was so exhausted.
All in all, it was a great day, a really good day.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
saturday excitement
I ended up with 2 instead of the 3 lessons, but when I woke up I wasn't even aware of the other lessons so it was a good surprise. I knew Aggie was coming home for the weekend, I just didn't know she was going to have a lesson until I got up. We couldn't have it at 2 like she wanted because I wasn't going to be home yet, so we ended up having it at 4. Now all lessons are done for the day. Amanda rescheduled hers because she is ill today. That is just fine, I don't mind the reschedule. It is better than the cancellation. Totally better. I do hope she feels better though because having a cold is a drag. You feel so horrible the first few days of it. Ugh, I had two this winter and am hoping I am done with the until next winter. I had two really bad ones too. Kayla has decided to sing "When Love Is Kind" with Amanda for the concert. She isn't sure if she wants to sing another piece or not. That is fine I told her. It is completely up to her and what she feels comfortable with. I am looking forward to the Spring Concert this year. We will have to have a summer one because the Muglia girls won't be able to be in the concert and neither will Christine because of other commitments and a new baby brother for the Muglia girls. Having a late Easter really messed me up schedule wise this year. Oh well, not really that big of a deal.
I have a bit more of a headache now than usual. I am not sure if it the weather or not. It's hard to say. So many are in flares right now so it is really hard to say. It is a normal missing mom day. Tomorrow will be a bit harder as it will be the first Easter without her. These firsts are so hard at times. I got through Christmas pretty okay and since I will be with Kathy, I know I will get through it.
Charlie did such a nice job at the trimming of the bushes. He really did. They look amazing and so much nicer. I will be having him do them again in a few months to keep them looking just so. He really did a great job. We will be returning the trimmer to Bob on Monday. I am so grateful and thankful that he loaned them to me.
It is so nice outside today that I wasn't even wearing a spring jacket. Nope, just my sweatshirt and fleece pants. Kathy and I went to the mall and put the scooter together. It wouldn't work. Apparently, there is a wire that is coming apart. We can see how it is supposed to go together, but we couldn't get it together. I have the number to call for service. I hope it doesn't cost too much. I think that is the problem because the batteries are fully charged so it has to be that wire. I have to have a scooter that is reliable. We did see another lady at the mall with a scooter and Kathy wanted to (me too) ask if she put it together herself because it was almost too heavy for Kathy to lift. It took the two of us to put it together too. I simply could not do it myself. That is for sure. It is 45 pounds for the back end alone plus the front end and the two batteries. Those batteries are very heavy. Thank goodness they work well - the batteries I mean. I think once the wire is fixed it will be okay. I will find out this week. Just what I need a broken scooter. Not cool, not cool at all. I sat in the courtyard area while Kathy went to the Disney Store. She came back empty handed because they didn't have the toy she wanted for the girls. We think they will find them in Disney World when they go in June. Then the girls can get Pascale, the little chameleon from Tangled. He is very cute. It will probably also mean a lot to them to get it there. I know when I buy stuff from there as opposed to a store it often means a bit more.
Well, other than the head, I am doing all right today. I can't wait until tomorrow, but I will have too. I am also exhausted at this point so early to bed I will be going. I do hope you have a great day and a Happy Easter too!
I have a bit more of a headache now than usual. I am not sure if it the weather or not. It's hard to say. So many are in flares right now so it is really hard to say. It is a normal missing mom day. Tomorrow will be a bit harder as it will be the first Easter without her. These firsts are so hard at times. I got through Christmas pretty okay and since I will be with Kathy, I know I will get through it.
Charlie did such a nice job at the trimming of the bushes. He really did. They look amazing and so much nicer. I will be having him do them again in a few months to keep them looking just so. He really did a great job. We will be returning the trimmer to Bob on Monday. I am so grateful and thankful that he loaned them to me.
It is so nice outside today that I wasn't even wearing a spring jacket. Nope, just my sweatshirt and fleece pants. Kathy and I went to the mall and put the scooter together. It wouldn't work. Apparently, there is a wire that is coming apart. We can see how it is supposed to go together, but we couldn't get it together. I have the number to call for service. I hope it doesn't cost too much. I think that is the problem because the batteries are fully charged so it has to be that wire. I have to have a scooter that is reliable. We did see another lady at the mall with a scooter and Kathy wanted to (me too) ask if she put it together herself because it was almost too heavy for Kathy to lift. It took the two of us to put it together too. I simply could not do it myself. That is for sure. It is 45 pounds for the back end alone plus the front end and the two batteries. Those batteries are very heavy. Thank goodness they work well - the batteries I mean. I think once the wire is fixed it will be okay. I will find out this week. Just what I need a broken scooter. Not cool, not cool at all. I sat in the courtyard area while Kathy went to the Disney Store. She came back empty handed because they didn't have the toy she wanted for the girls. We think they will find them in Disney World when they go in June. Then the girls can get Pascale, the little chameleon from Tangled. He is very cute. It will probably also mean a lot to them to get it there. I know when I buy stuff from there as opposed to a store it often means a bit more.
Well, other than the head, I am doing all right today. I can't wait until tomorrow, but I will have too. I am also exhausted at this point so early to bed I will be going. I do hope you have a great day and a Happy Easter too!
Friday, April 22, 2011
tired
I am rather tired now. I got up early to get the trimmer for Charlie. He finished all the trimming today. He spent about 5 or so hours all together. It looks great. So much better than before. I can smile as I come up to the front of my house. I am very excited about it. I am so happy with what he did. What a great job is all I can say. However, because I needed to get the trimmer, I am a bit tired tonight. I plan to head for bed rather soon.
Tomorrow will be such an awesome day!!!! I will teach my two lessons, which will be good and then...I get Kathy!!!! We are heading to the mall too!!! I have my scooter in the trunk ready to go. I even know where the key is! (attached to the car key ring) Afternoon 1 with Kathy. It will be so awesome. We are going to eat first and then to the mall to the Disney store. I haven't been in the Disney store for about 2 to 3 years as we have gone to Disney world itself, no need to go to the Disney store. I miss buying mom cute Disney stuff. I really do. She would just get so excited about it too. When we were in Disney in 2008, I couldn't find any, I mean any, of her t-shirts that I had bought her the year before to bring with us. Basically, I packed her some jeans and 2 t-shirts with all the necessary under clothes. When we got to Disney world I needed to buy her a new t-shirt everyday we were there because she didn't have clean clothes. She was so cute about it to. I did bring her hoodie jackets with us, but she didn't really need them too much until we went inside. It rained a lot though while we were there. Everyday, sometimes, all day. Yeah, June in Florida is not pleasant with the rain. We wore our ponchos all the time. We did have a good time. Had I known that it would be Mom's last trip ever and my last trip for a really long time, I would have had us stay a few days longer. I really would have but I couldn't see the future. If I could I would have run and hid because in August 2008 the bank came and took the store, all of it. They even sold the fixtures. Yeah, we lost everything so I think I would have hid from the future. I gave the Muglia girls some of her hoodies that she barely wore, if ever. I did give them the Disney ones too but I did tell them she wore some of them. They didn't care. They were clean, that is all that matters. I also wish I took more pictures of her while we were in Disney too. Here are a couple of the pictures we did take.
Tomorrow will be such an awesome day!!!! I will teach my two lessons, which will be good and then...I get Kathy!!!! We are heading to the mall too!!! I have my scooter in the trunk ready to go. I even know where the key is! (attached to the car key ring) Afternoon 1 with Kathy. It will be so awesome. We are going to eat first and then to the mall to the Disney store. I haven't been in the Disney store for about 2 to 3 years as we have gone to Disney world itself, no need to go to the Disney store. I miss buying mom cute Disney stuff. I really do. She would just get so excited about it too. When we were in Disney in 2008, I couldn't find any, I mean any, of her t-shirts that I had bought her the year before to bring with us. Basically, I packed her some jeans and 2 t-shirts with all the necessary under clothes. When we got to Disney world I needed to buy her a new t-shirt everyday we were there because she didn't have clean clothes. She was so cute about it to. I did bring her hoodie jackets with us, but she didn't really need them too much until we went inside. It rained a lot though while we were there. Everyday, sometimes, all day. Yeah, June in Florida is not pleasant with the rain. We wore our ponchos all the time. We did have a good time. Had I known that it would be Mom's last trip ever and my last trip for a really long time, I would have had us stay a few days longer. I really would have but I couldn't see the future. If I could I would have run and hid because in August 2008 the bank came and took the store, all of it. They even sold the fixtures. Yeah, we lost everything so I think I would have hid from the future. I gave the Muglia girls some of her hoodies that she barely wore, if ever. I did give them the Disney ones too but I did tell them she wore some of them. They didn't care. They were clean, that is all that matters. I also wish I took more pictures of her while we were in Disney too. Here are a couple of the pictures we did take.
As you can see, we had a great time with our character meals. It was definitely the best way to eat meals. Mom and I loved Disney World. It will be hard to go again without the little lady.
I do hope you are feeling well today and looking forward to have a great Easter.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
thursday
I had Breanna's lesson earlier today. She is doing very well. She is almost ready to start learning a new hand position in piano. She is slowly learning how to read the notes faster, which is simply wonderful. She picked her 2nd voice solo for the spring concert. She will sing "The Sound of Music". I adore that song. I love it so much. I love the movie too. Before Christmas I had the TV on and a movie started showing the Alps in Austria and I thought, wow, that looks like the Sound of Music, well, I was right! So I just stayed where I was and watched the entire for the I don't know how many times. The first time I saw it I watched it with Momma. She bought the record for me too so I could learn all the songs (much to my brothers dismay!). Momma and I would play that record over and over again. When the VHS came out and we had a video player, Mom bought the movie. Then on her 70th birthday, we got it on DVD. I still have it. I love watching it on TV, especially without commercials.
tomorrow I am going to cook the last of the corned beef. I have a whole brisket to cook in the crock pot. I just love corned beef. I often get it for lunch meat at the store when grocery shopping. It is soooooo yummy. I bought 2 of them before St. Patrick's Day. It was the first time I had seen any at the grocery store this year. I wish they sold it all year round, but I can deal with it just during March and April. I am going to put red potatoes in too. I have some left. Yum! It will be a good dinner for the next few days. I will split it up and then I will freeze the other portions.
I don't have anything but potential housework for the rest of the evening. I don't have anymore lessons for the day. I did go to the used bookstore for a few more books. I do hope they are good. They sound very good. I brought some books back to them too that I didn't want to keep. The problem is that I usually want to keep the books I purchase so it is hard to have trades but right now I have 5 more trades so that is good. I can't wait until all the books are in the family room in the library part of the family room. It will be awesome! Now that tax season is over, I can speak with Julie and we can plan when we are going to do this. I don't know why some of the books were even taking off the other book shelf, but they were. I am keeping all those books and I said so at the time they were taking off the shelf. I said I was keeping them and to leave them there, but they were moved anyway. Now they will go back where they belong. I have a lot of history books and biographies too as well as novels. One year, I gave up reading novels for Lent. Now I am not Catholic (I am Methodist), but it seemed like a good idea. Mom was the only one who thought I would be able to do it because I read all the time. My brothers both thought I wouldn't be able to do it. Let me tell you, that was the hardest Lent Season ever! I did, however, survive and that was when I discovered the history books and the biographies so it turned out to be a good idea. On Easter Sunday, I told the family to leave me be I was going to read all day! I think I did read most of the day too. Even though at the time I did most of the cooking, Mom always did the cooking on the holidays. She was an excellent holiday cook. When it came to turkeys or anything special like that, it was awesome! I did learn a bit about holiday cooking from her, but I am thankful that Mrs. Knight will be doing the cooking! I am thankful for that. I am bringing Easter treats for the children. I am excited about doing that.
I have regular pain level today so I am glad. I do hope this finds you well too!!!
tomorrow I am going to cook the last of the corned beef. I have a whole brisket to cook in the crock pot. I just love corned beef. I often get it for lunch meat at the store when grocery shopping. It is soooooo yummy. I bought 2 of them before St. Patrick's Day. It was the first time I had seen any at the grocery store this year. I wish they sold it all year round, but I can deal with it just during March and April. I am going to put red potatoes in too. I have some left. Yum! It will be a good dinner for the next few days. I will split it up and then I will freeze the other portions.
I don't have anything but potential housework for the rest of the evening. I don't have anymore lessons for the day. I did go to the used bookstore for a few more books. I do hope they are good. They sound very good. I brought some books back to them too that I didn't want to keep. The problem is that I usually want to keep the books I purchase so it is hard to have trades but right now I have 5 more trades so that is good. I can't wait until all the books are in the family room in the library part of the family room. It will be awesome! Now that tax season is over, I can speak with Julie and we can plan when we are going to do this. I don't know why some of the books were even taking off the other book shelf, but they were. I am keeping all those books and I said so at the time they were taking off the shelf. I said I was keeping them and to leave them there, but they were moved anyway. Now they will go back where they belong. I have a lot of history books and biographies too as well as novels. One year, I gave up reading novels for Lent. Now I am not Catholic (I am Methodist), but it seemed like a good idea. Mom was the only one who thought I would be able to do it because I read all the time. My brothers both thought I wouldn't be able to do it. Let me tell you, that was the hardest Lent Season ever! I did, however, survive and that was when I discovered the history books and the biographies so it turned out to be a good idea. On Easter Sunday, I told the family to leave me be I was going to read all day! I think I did read most of the day too. Even though at the time I did most of the cooking, Mom always did the cooking on the holidays. She was an excellent holiday cook. When it came to turkeys or anything special like that, it was awesome! I did learn a bit about holiday cooking from her, but I am thankful that Mrs. Knight will be doing the cooking! I am thankful for that. I am bringing Easter treats for the children. I am excited about doing that.
I have regular pain level today so I am glad. I do hope this finds you well too!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
