Thursday, August 30, 2012

Neurologist Day 8-30

I went to see my new neurologist this afternoon.  I brought my MRI films for her to see.  She looked at the one envelope of films.  She is going to have her assistant get a hold of the reports from the neurology-radiologist to see what he/she thought.  So far, with a quick glance, she doesn't see anything like the anomaly that the doctors were freaking out over in 2008.  I am rather glad about that but oh my,  is all I can say about that.  She also said that she would not have me do any MRIs at this point unless she sees something or if there is something in the report that concerns her.  I told her that I would need to be knocked out totally to get another.  They are just so loud and with the headaches I already have, add that extra noise and I am even in more pain than before.  So far I don't need to have another MRI done so I don't have to worry about whether or not they will knock me out.

Tomorrow is my monthly blood test for my pro-time level.  I don't particularly like getting the blood tests, but they are important.  If my blood gets too thick, then I could get another blood clot (not an event I would ever like to repeat) or if it is too thin, I could bleed to death so it is important that it is checked every month.  Sometimes I have to get it checked every other week depending on how my blood is.

I only ended up with 1 lesson today.  I am not sure what is going on but my 4:30 and 5:00 didn't show again this week.  Then my 6 and 6:30 were also absent.  Their mom did call and they will be here next week.  Then, tomorrow I only have Acer and Calli as Emily and Natalie are absent too so it will be a quiet day.  I plan to do my hair and let it dry naturally.  I want to see how long it will take to dry naturally instead of using a dryer.

I am watching "Without a Trace" and in the episode, the character, Jack's father has Alzheimer's.  He gets very confused, more so than Mom did.  She is still on mind a lot this week.  I think it is because of the family events we have had lately.  I am still sad at times because she is not here but other times I am okay.  I think if I just knew what she wanted me to do now that she isn't here.  I would never talk about it.  I just couldn't because I knew it was coming faster than I wanted it too.  In the TV show, the dad is so much worse off than mom was as far as memory.  Mom didn't remember a lot of things, but she could still recognize me and some of the family.  The dad in the show keeps getting flash backs to earlier times.  Mom never did that, thankfully.  I tried to focus on her in the moment with things like paper for example.  She loved ripping paper so I bought cheap notebooks for her to write on or whatever.  I also had toys she could fiddle around with.  The best toy though was her musical Donald Duck.  She would play with that for hours.  You press his foot and he starts to walk and sing.  Donald is dressed up as a bunny (it was an Easter Gift).  If you hold him up by the ears, he says, "put me down, put me down".  It is just the cutest thing.  All the students seem to like him the best out of all my students.  It does make me smile each time I hear the song or the put me down that he says.

I am working on my fall schedule.  So far there aren't too many changes, just a few.  I am hoping for about 3 to 4 new students.  That would be good and it will completely fill my schedule.  I try not to schedule too many a day because I do get so tired so easily.  I think about 4 or 5 students a day is good for me.

I am going to read for a bit before heading upstairs to bed.  I am getting rather tired now but not tired enough to sleep though.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

The dining room table is organized day 8-28

I know it is hard to believe, but it is true.  The dining room table has been organized and the old, ripped up vinyl table cloth is now history.  I have learned an important lesson, buy fabric tablecloths because they last longer.  These $4 ones just don't take the beating that my dining room table goes through.  I don't have a tablecloth on right now but that is okay.  The tabletop is glass so it is okay not to have a tablecloth on it right now but I do need to find a nice one that I like, only it will be fabric this time, not vinyl.

I only had 1 lesson this afternoon.  My Sammy was absent but she is making up the lesson tomorrow.  I am very glad about that.  She is such a good student.  I am very pleased with her, not to mention she is such a sweetheart!  My other girls all think she is very, very nice.  I am not surprised though because she is very nice and I knew she would get along with my students.

Dan was my only student for the day.  It was his first lesson with me.  We reviewed a few things and then I assigned him a few things to work on this week.  His sister will start next week with me.  He is a very nice young man.  He is 11 and going into 6th grade.

Tonight is NCIS night.  I just don't feel like watching Dance Moms.  I am getting a little sick of how insane the dance teacher and moms are.  I will admit that I love watching the girls dance.  They are so talented and graceful.  It does make me miss dancing.  I loved dancing so much.  In my dreams, I can dance all I want and these days, that is enough.

Saturday was my cousin, Lia's wedding as I stated in a previous post.  It was the first time that it didn't hurt as much to not have mom at a family function.  I have a hard time with family functions because mom is not there with me.  This was the first time it wasn't super bad.  Maybe I wasn't so upset because I was upset a few days earlier.  I don't know.  I have yet to figure out why I do what I do.  Maybe someday I will have  figured myself out!

I am anxious for fall as I am hoping to have a very full schedule.  (That would be an additional 2 to 3 students, not anymore than that)  I have had a lot of absences this summer but that is to be expected.  I am hoping that once fall arrives, there will be less absences.  Usually, that is what happens.

I will be having a movie day with the Muglia girls on Saturday.  I am to bring the Sound of Music and The Hunger Games, if I have it by then otherwise I will bring something else in addition to the Sound of Music.  I like watching movies with the girls.  They are a lot of fun to hang out with.

I am going to finish watching NCIS and NCIS Los Angeles now.  I hope you are having a good day.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

the last several days

Thursday -

I miss Mom so much today.  She has been on my mind a lot these past few days.  I am not sure exactly why as it isn't a birthday or anniversary or any special day of hers, just a regular day.  I have so much I want to tell her and sometimes it just explodes inside my head.  Today, seems to be one of those type days.  I am much better than I used to be.  The tears and being upset or sad all the time is mostly managed.  Yes, I still cry at times but those are not so many times now like they were when she first died.  I do still some days think when I wake up, oh, time to go and get mom, and then I remember, no I don't have to go and get mom ready for the day.  She is ready for the day in Heaven.  I just want to be with her.  I have many friends who want the same thing.  It does help a lot to know I am not alone in this.  I am thankful for the friends I have because without them, it would be much harder.  I know I will see her again someday and that helps too, but like my friend, Chantal, I want it now not later!  We are both impatient to be with our mothers again.

Sunday 8-26

Well, so much for finishing the post I started on Thursday.  What can I say?  I got distracted.  Yesterday was my cousin, Lia's wedding.  She was such a beautiful bride!  It was a very nice wedding and I enjoyed myself.  I did have to leave a bit earlier that I expected too because my head was really sore by the end of dinner before the dancing started.  I wasn't planning to dance either since I can't stand up long enough to dance but overall, it was a good night.  I finally met my cousin, Danielle's little guy.  Miles is about 10 months now and I got to play with him twice.  Kayla didn't bring Phoenix so I didn't get to see her but that is okay.  I am sure I will see her and her brother, Warren, soon.  The little ones are so cute.  Andrew, my younger brother, was also there.  He seems like he is doing well.  He moved again and is very happy with his new apartment.  I was glad to see him at the wedding.

I am getting a bit tired now so I am going to read for a bit before I go to bed.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

wednesday 8-22

It was a lovely day outside today.  The sun was shining and the sky was a blue blue blue with white puffy clouds, my favorite type of day.  The temperature was just right, not too hot, not too cold.  I had 2 lessons today.  Antoinette had to reschedule to Friday because her dog is sick and has to go the vet tonight.

I had lunch with my friend, Wendy today too.  It was lots of fun.  I see her every few months and we have a good time together.  I am hoping to see Jen sometime next month after school starts for her children.  Jen auditioned for her local community theatre and she got a part!  I was so happy for her.  We spent some time working together on her music so she would be ready and the hard work paid off.  I am going to see Jen in the play sometime in October.  I will be going on Sunday afternoon.  It should be a good time.  The music to the musical is rather funny.  The name of the musical is "I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change".  Jen was very excited when she told me she got a part.  This past Monday was the first day of practicing for her.

My cousin, Lia, is getting married on Saturday.  I am going to the wedding.  My aunt, uncle, and several cousins will be there too.  Lia and Rick's daughter, Esther will be one of the flower girls.  My young cousin, Elizabeth will be the other one.  I hope I remember to bring my camera.  I have a tendency not to remember so I just hope that I do.  I think my younger brother, Andrew will be there also.  It will be the first time I will see Maia since she was diagnosed with cancer earlier this summer.  She has been going to chemotherapy every three weeks and will have her surgery soon.  It all depends on her MRI and how the cancer is doing.

On Friday, my aunt and uncle are supposed to come over.  I am not sure what time or anything.  They have some packages that they need to pick up and take home.  Hayley also has a package to pick up too but I am not bringing it the wedding because I don't want to pay duty on her package and when you bring packages across the border sometimes you have to pay duty.  I do have to get Lia her wedding present.  I am going to get them tomorrow.  I have to get a nice card to and then sign both mine and my brother's names since I told him I would.  I already know what I am going to get her, I just have to go and pick it up.

I am hoping that this fall I may be able to attend the support group meetings for fibro again.  I had to stop going because I was teaching at that time.  I am not sure if I will be able to or not but I will try.  I did enjoy them when I used to go.  They are on Mondays, once a month.  I think it is on the 2nd Monday of the month.  I just checked, it is.  The September meeting is about social security disability so I am not sure I will attend that one since I don't really need any new info on that.  About once a year, this firm comes in to talk about the process of getting disability and how to apply, appeal if necessary.

My new student, Eliana is 6.  She is so cute.  She more comfortable with the right hand (treble clef) than she is with the left hand (bass clef).  I need to get her the theory book that goes with the book she is using.  I am hoping that she will learn the bass clef notes down very soon.  I think she will do very well.  I also have a young man (11) going to start next week, Tuesday.  I will be calling his mom tomorrow to introduce myself to her.  Allison had her lesson today.  She is working on "On My Own" from the Les Miserables.  I simply love that musical so much.  It has been made into a movie and one of my favorite actresses is in it, Anne Hathaway.  Hugh Jackman is also in it too.  I just can't wait to see it in the movies.  Allison is also working on a song from Mary Poppins the Broadway, "Practically Perfect".  It is such a cute song.  Her Italian piece is giving her a bit of a fit right now, but I think in a week or so, she will have it down pat.  Overall, I am rather pleased with her progress.  Tomorrow I have 5 lessons, my 2 little ones, Faith, Dede, and Wama.  Dede and Wama are doing super well.  They started in January and are already in their 3rd book.

I am going to read for a bit now before I head for bed.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Tuesday 8-21

I had 2 lessons this afternoon.  My newest student, Sammy (15 and a vocalist) had her lesson and Aubrey (7 and a pianist) had hers today instead of tomorrow since they will be busy tomorrow.  David has changed his day to Saturday.  Tomorrow I have a new student.  She is 6 and has played for a bit.  I always am excited for a new student.  Then I have Allison and Antoinette.  Antoinette has moved into the level 3 books now.  We are both excited about this.

School starts next week for some of my students.  The public school students do not start until after Labor Day.  This Saturday is my cousin, Lia's wedding.  It should be interesting.  My aunt and uncle will be there as well as some cousins that I haven't seen in a while.  My younger brother will be there too.

I am watching Dance Moms as it is Tuesday and NCIS and NCIS Los Angeles are re-runs.  When fall comes, I will switch back to the NCIS and NCIS Los Angeles.  Anyways, it is amusing as ever.

My younger brother must have surgery soon.  He has a lump right next to his spine in his neck and it must be removed.  I had to read this on face book.  I have since spoken to him and he will let me know what is going on before posting it on face book.

I am reading a new book about healthy eating and how to stay with eating healthy.  So far it is good.  I think I have been doing rather well eating healthy but I want to be even better.  I rarely have cravings and usually my cravings are for milk or a Peanut Butter/Jelly or Honey sandwich.  That is what I like a lot of.  My goal is to be 1/2 my size by the beginning of next summer.  I don't think I will have any problems getting that way either.

Well, I am tired tonight so I think it is time for a bit of reading before going to bed.

Monday, August 20, 2012

The Life I Live in my Head 8-20

Sometimes I think the life in my head is better than the one I live.  In my head, I can do anything.  I can dance again, walk for long walks again, do anything I want physically, it is beautiful.  I know that I am a daydreamer and I always have been.  I would look out the window and see my beautiful dreams in the air.  My friends think it is kind of weird that I can do that, but I always have been able to.  In my dreams, I am running and jumping, flying all around.  In some ways I do live my dreams, just on a limited basis.  I have accepted (or whatever you want to call it) that I can't do stuff right now, but with the leaps and bounds the medical field is advancing, it is hard to say that I won't ever be able to dance again.  I want to be able to dance again, just a slow dance, I know ballet and lyrical (my favorite genres of dance) is out of the question but slow dancing is not.  Some day I will be able to slow dance again.  I just know it.

I also wonder if others day dream and live in their heads like I do.  I have seen some of the postings that others have put on face book about what people think they do, what they think they do, and what they really do.  Some are really funny.

I think one of the  things I discovered about living a much more mellow life since I got sick, is noticing the beauty in life.  I love to go scootering and looking at the beautiful flowers, trees, and nature in general.  Mom and I used to scooter/walk every night after dinner in the summer of 2009.  We would go different directions to see different things.  Mom was always looking at the beauty of nature.  I love gardens.  Unfortunately, I can kill a plant just by looking at it.  Mom was the green thumb of the family, not me.  I was not very good at telling the difference between a plant and a weed.  In fact, until the flowers were blooming, I didn't know what they were.  It was worse with the vegetables because I never knew when they needed to be harvested so yeah, they usually died in the garden.  I appreciate people who can garden and make things grow, I just wish I were one of them like mom and several of my friends.  When I was on vacation one year at the US Virgin Islands, I went to see some really beautiful gardens.  They are so peaceful and beautiful.  I also think that when you slow down life, the stress level may go down.  It did for me (mostly).  Unfortunately, the anxiety level didn't go down with the stress.  I have medicine for it again.  I hoping that soon I will be able to go off it again and not have high anxiety.  I was able to do that in 2008 and my anxiety wasn't so bad until the last summer for Mom.  That is when it went through the roof and I should have let my family doctor know, but I didn't.

In 2 weeks school will be starting again.  Another school year will be under way.  Soon the fall will arrive and summer will be a dream.  I am looking forward to the weather that fall brings.  So far, August has not been too hot like July.  July had many days at 100 and close to it.  I am glad that it isn't too hot at this time.  It is simply beautiful out.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Concert Day 8-19

Today was the Summer Concert for the students.  We had 15 numbers with 14 students.  One student, Acer plays piano and sings too so he does 2 songs, one for each instrument.  Calli, Natalie Z, and Camille did the announcing.  They did a good job.  I think in the Christmas Concert I will have 4 announcers.  We had a BBQ after the concert.  It was very good and everything turned out nicely.  It was also Bill's and Breanna's birthday today.  I am glad they spent their birthdays with us.  The cake and cup cakes were really yummy.  I even had a small piece of birthday cake.  It had chocolate mousse in the middle of it.  Yummy.  That is all I can say about that.  I have done so well with eating healthy that I had a small piece and I was satisfied with the small piece whereas before I may not have been but now I am.  I did have a small spoonful of potato salad too although I had a bigger plate full of regular salad.  That was the biggest thing on my plate.  Several families stayed for the BBQ although some didn't.  I knew they wouldn't because they let me know ahead of time.  It was a nice afternoon with the students.  I had a good time.  Now, of course, I have the after the concert headache and my legs ache more from walking a lot.  This too, is not a surprise.  It happens after every concert.  I am used to it by now.  It is kind of weird that I am used to it, but I am.  I know what to expect after the concert.  I also forgot my camera today.  I didn't pull it out last night so I would have it for today.  Woops!  I do hope to remember for the next concert.

Right now is a NCIS marathon on USA channel.  I have seen all of these episodes before but I love the show so I don't mind the re-runs.  There isn't that much on a Sunday night.  Army Wives is on, but I have missed a few episodes so I am not sure what is going on.  I may just buy the season when it is out.  We will have to wait and see.

I teach at 11 am tomorrow.  I have Isaac followed by Rachel, Bob, Sammy, and Rahul as far as I know.  Things can easily change that is for sure so I am very flexible if I can be.  I try to be anyways.  I figure that if I am flexible with them, when I need to change lesson times, then they will be flexible with me.

I am going to read for a bit now before bed.  I am getting up a bit earlier than usual so I am going to go to bed a little earlier than usual.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

The Day Before the Concert 8-18

Today is also Kathy's twins birthday!  Alicia and Samantha are now 6!!!!!!  What a lovely age!  They are such cuties.  Next week is their birthday party with their friends.  This will be the first for them.  I expect they will have a great time.

I am rather lightheaded today but I don't understand why.  It is just one of those type days, I suppose.  I am not sure what is going on but hey, the head isn't so sore today so that is good.  I had a headache when I woke up but now it is almost gone.  This is a first for me, I think.  I am hoping that by tomorrow  the dizziness will be gone.

I waiting for the programs for the concert tomorrow to finish printing.  Natalie drew the picture. She did a very good job as usual.  She is a good artist.  Natalie, Hannah, and Lydia will be taking art together next school year with my friend, Star.  I am excited about them taking art classes.  They are all ready good artists so they can only improve.  Natalie and Hannah want to be animators and Lydia wants to be a Fashion Designer.  Lydia is really good at sewing.  She has several sewing books that she is using for projects.  All 3 are also really good at piano too.  They are among my more advanced students.  The only student more advanced then those 3 is Bob.  He won't be in the concert tomorrow because they have tickets for a baseball game.  This will actually be the 3rd concert he has missed in a row.  He missed Christmas because of working, Spring because of tickets for some event, and now, Summer for the baseball game.  I think I will have to check his schedule before I plan the next concert.  Now, I have to burn the CD for the vocalists.  It makes it much easier for Bill (sound person) if all the songs are on one CD.

I am almost ready for the concert way earlier than the last concert.  It is surprising but a good surprise.  I don't mind these type of surprises though, they are good surprises.

I didn't have any lessons today, just shopping for the concert and the programs for the concert.  It should be a fun recital especially since there is BBQ right after.  I was going to get hamburgers, but I changed my mind and got hot dogs instead.  I do have veggie burgers for my vegetarians.  I am not sure who all is vegetarian, but I am prepared.  I know Rick is but I am not sure who else.

I was reading one of the blogs I normally read and it was about Fibro awareness.  It still amazes me that people don't believe it is real or that we aren't really sick.  Since the release of Lyrica and some of the other new medicines, the awareness of Fibro has also gone up and so has the acceptance of Fibro.  I have been rather lucky as my family has always supported me and never questioned me of whether or not I am really sick or not.  Mom was the best though and Andrew (the little bro) too.  Mom went with me a lot when we were going to doctor after doctor trying to find out what is wrong with me.  She went with me when I went to the Cleveland Clinic when we thought I still had the vasculitis.  It was there that I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia.  Of course, the doctor I have now has known all about Fibro for years before I was diagnosed and I could have had some relief much sooner but I stopped complaining to doctors about the pain and fatigue.  I am glad that unlike others, I have had a doctor to work with since day one of the diagnose.  I also am different in the way, I actually like that I don't look sick because I don't want pity.  People only know something is wrong because I use a scooter or a wheelchair for long distances or for when I have to stand for a very long time.  Other than that, only my friends and family know the extent of my illnesses.  I do wish everyone with these invisible illnesses had the support that I have.  Not all of my family is supportive though, just like so many.  One particular person cannot handle how sick I can get.  He doesn't understand the nature of the illnesses or the fatigue and just says I sleep too much.  He doesn't like that at all.  I have just gotten to the point that what other people think (the negative and naysayers type people) doesn't bother me.  i don't really care. The people who are important to me believe me and support me.  I just ignore those who don't, most of the time.  Yes, I do have days where it does bother me but today isn't one of them.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

hmmmm, mid week and mid month 8-15

Hmmmmmmmmmm, it has been a rather quiet type day.  Isaac had a lesson, Allison had her lesson, and soon, Antoinette will have her lesson.  Antoinette and I seem to talk so much before and after a lesson.  Today she starts level 3 books.  It is pretty cool especially since she only started in about September.  She also played the flute through out high school so that has definitely helped her a lot.  I went and picked up her books this afternoon after Isaac's lesson.  I didn't even check out the new books and sheet music the store had.  I went in, got the books I needed, ordered the one that they were out of, paid, and then walked out.  Let me tell you, that is the HARDEST thing to do!  Sheet music stores are one of the worst stores for me to go into to!  I always think I need more music when really, I don't.  I have 3 legal size filing cabinets filled with music.  Serious, I mean completely filled, not with one inch of space left.  I now have to put new music in a box because it doesn't fit in the cabinets.  I would get another file cabinet, however, there is no room in the office for it so I can't get one.  I wish I had a place to put one but I don't.  I do try to refrain from buying new music.  Since all the Harry Potter movies are done, I now have all the piano books for them.  I don't need anymore.  I am so thankful to my mom though, because she catalogued all of my music and that was a HUGE job.  Thankfully, mom was a patient little mom and did this important job for me.  Okay, at first, I didn't see the necessity of this job, but I quickly realized how much easier it was to find what I needed by having everything on the computer.  I just check find, type in the name or parts of the name, and boom!  the music shows up with what number it is.  I go to the filing cabinet and pull it out.  It is such a breeze.  It is the putting of music away that is the hard job.  That one, I am ALWAYS behind on, pretty much always.  I try, but it is a losing battle for me.

Last night I went to my Live Journal and went to my very first post.  I think I spent an hour reading them up to December 2010.  I never realized how much I wrote about how mom was doing and some of the fears I had.  Some of it was funny to read, like the time I actually swore at her (I don't typically use that type of language as I work with children!).  I do remember that day rather well.  Momma would not, and I mean not in any shape or form, get into the car to go to Tim Horton's for brunch.  I begged, I pleaded, I got mad, and then, I swore at her to get in the car.  Nothing worked.  So I took her back into the house, placed her in her chair in the living room, went into the dining room, threw the box of Kleenex on the floor, the pile of music that was on the table on the floor, and promptly sat down and cried.  I was so frustrated, not only because she had never refused to get in the car before, but also because I was so upset that I swore at her.  It was so frustrating.  After about 15 minutes or so this little voice comes out of the living room, telling me she was hungry.  All I had to do was wait a few minutes and then we would have been fine.  I got up and got her ready to go outside.  She got in the car like she usually did, no refusing, no upsets, no nothing.  This, of course, made me even madder at myself than I already was.  I was so frustrated with myself pretty much the entire day.  Tillie called me later that evening and I told her what had happened.  She bursted out laughing.  She actually said to me that she didn't know I actually knew what those words were and how to use them.  Of course I have heard swear words before, just because I don't choose to use them doesn't mean other people don't.  Heck, most of my relatives use them rather frequently.  To this day, I have yet to hear the end of the day I swore at mom.  I admit now, it is kind of funny, but not too funny.

So reading the posts were both amusing and upsetting (near her end time) for me.  I was right when I wrote that the mother's day we celebrated would be her last as was her birthday.  I didn't get my wish to have her last longer so I could go all out for her at Christmas.  Then again, how would I feel about Christmas if she passed away around then?  I totally hate the month of October with the 18th being the worst day ever so to hate the month of December would totally put the emphasis on what I hate as opposed to on the celebration of Jesus' birth where it belongs so I supposed I must grudgingly admit, God does know better than me.  Besides, the little mom was so ready to go.  It is me who wanted her to stick around wayyyyyy longer than she did.  I don't seem to be as upset as I used to be when I think about her.  Sometimes, I have even admitted there are things I don't miss with taking care of her.  I don't miss trying to feed her or have her feed herself, for example.  I think it is mostly the companionship of her I miss the most.  She was such a good little mom and she was very little.  Mom was about 5'3 3/4" and when she died she weighed 84.6 pounds.  Now when Mom was healthier she weighed about 100 to 115, which was healthy for her.  I didn't inherit her body shape and size, nope, from chin up I am all Mom and from chin down I am all dad's side of the family.  However, I am working very hard at losing the excess weight and my goal is to be 1/2 my size by next summer.  I think I will get there since I am working hard at it.  So far, eating healthy IS going well and I am down some weight.  I will get weighed again at the neurologist's office when I have my appointment on August 30.  That will be the day we re-exam the new medicines and adjust the dosage.  So far, it isn't working too well.  I am sure that we will find the right dosage and someday in the future I will actually not have a headache every single day of my life.  I, unfortunately, can't remember what it is like not to have a headache, so that will feel rather strange to me, but I am sure it is a feeling I can get used to super fast!

Well, my lovely Antoinette will be here shortly so I need to get a few things out for her lesson.  It is like the perfect temperature today too.  Blue sky, puffy white clouds, bright sun shining, and no rain!  I love these type days!

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Tuesday 8-14

Not too much happening today other than teaching and of course, Dance Moms since it is Tuesday and both NCIS shows are in re-runs.  I had several more lessons today that I don't usual have because students needed to change their schedule.  I don't mind, I would so much rather to reschedule than cancel.  Aubrey, Jillian, and Brooke had their lessons today instead of tomorrow.  Sammy and Laith had their regular lessons today.  Tomorrow I have to pick up some music for Antoinette.  She is moving up to level 3.  I am pretty happy with how she is doing.

Sunday is the Summer concert.  It will be smaller than usual because it is summer but I don't mind.  It is less that I have to be nervous and anxious about.  We are having a BBQ after the concert.  I like this "end of the summer" party we have and it is a good time with all the students.

Yesterday, my little boys had their lessons.  Rahul has just turned 5 and his older brother, Samuel has just turned 6.  Rahul is in the younger, Little Mozart series while Samuel is in the Prep series which is a step up from Little Mozarts.  Rahul is so funny when he does his work book.  Most of the time he is a little independent guy except when he has to be pretty much glued to my side in order to do his work book.  He will get out his crayons, he will get his stickers, of course, this means he has to stand up on the piano bench and then walk on my legs to get these thing.  I have tried to get them for him but he is independent and get it himself.  How can you not encourage being independent?  He and his brother are doing pretty well.  They are slowly learning notes so that is good.

I also had a lovely surprise yesterday.  Isaac is back for regular lessons.  He had his last lesson at the end of June.  Isaac was at camps, family vacations, more camps, and VBS all during the month of July. I am very happy to see him.  He is a really good singer and coming along pretty well with piano although I would be much happier with his piano progress if he would practice more.

I have to remember to call the neurologist tomorrow.  The new medicine isn't working.  Last night I had a bad headache again (seems to happen way way way too much these days), I tried the Cambia and it didn't work.  The every day headache has also not gone down any with the new every night medicine.  One day a few weeks ago, I did wake up without a headache, but by the end of the day, it hurt again.

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Sunday 8-12

It has been a nice day here today.  I had 3 lessons for the day.  I had Rick, Emily, and Minh's lessons.  Emily has chosen her Summer Recital piece now.  She is going to play "Prelude" from her level 2 lesson book.  It is a cute piece that she does rather well.  Minh and Rick chose their pieces a bit ago.  It is so hard to believe that the concert is only 6 days away.  Wow, I am so unprepared right now.  I will be prepared by the time the concert comes around though, that is for sure.  Tomorrow I am going to price hamburger and buns for the BBQ.  I also am going to be asking students' parents who is planning to stay for the BBQ.  That will be important since I have no idea who is coming and staying.  I have an idea of which students are performing but not an idea of how many are staying.  So far, I know of 1 family who will not be staying because they are fasting during the day right now for Ramadan.

Anne of Green Gables is on TV tonight along with the Harry Potter number 6.  I do have both on DVD but I am watching Anne.  I remember the first time I read the Anne of Green Gable book.  It was like a magical book.  She talked as much as I did and it was just wonderful.  I remember crying at the end because it was the end.  Then Mom told me that there were 7 more books in the series.  We went to the library and got the all the next day.  I think that lasted me about a week or so.  I read very fast so I go through books very quickly.  I wish I didn't, but I do.  I simply love the Anne books.  I even have 2 Anne dolls and a Diana doll.  I have several figurines and one music box of Anne.  I got some at Disney World in Epcot in the Canadian Pavilion.  Mom and I loved them so much.  I also have a plush doll of Anne.  It is very cute.  Mom had one too.  I have it to Calli since she loves Anne too.  I gave Acer the plane Mom had.  He liked it a lot.

I am not sure what day it was, but one day this week I woke up early, about 7 am.  I was fine for a few minutes and then all of a sudden I was crying and missing Mom so much.  It was just like it was when she first passed away.  I think I cried for about 15 or so minutes and then fell back asleep.  I was fine when I finally got up for the day.  It was just very strange.  I mean, I miss her a lot all the time, but I don't have the crushing feeling in my chest anymore.  Yet, on that day, I did.  It hurt physically to miss her that day.  That hasn't happened in a while.  I think I am used to her being gone now.  I (most of the time) no longer think, oh, time to get Momma up or time to put Momma to bed.  I still have the sign on her room though.  I haven't been able to take it off yet.  Someday, but I still refer to that room as hers.  To me, it is still her bedroom.

Well, it is getting a bit late and I want to read a bit before bed tonight, mainly to calm my anxiety.  Thank goodness I have medicine now for the anxiety.  I had to go back on the Effexor because my anxiety was getting so high again.  I probably should have had it right after Mom passed away, but I was trying not to need it.  Well, I need it.  I also have my relaxation techniques that I do to help calm down.  I don't need to give myself an anxiety attack or an asthma attack as when I get an anxiety attack, I often end up with an asthma attack too.  I have stress related asthma so that is why it sometimes happens.  Silly asthma!

Saturday, August 11, 2012

a lovely afternoon with my girls!!! 8-11

I had such a lovely last couple of days.  Last night, after teaching a few lessons, I was invited to the Hubel's house for a girls night!  We watched "National Treasure 2" and had dinner.  It was wonderful! Then today, I went to the Muglia's house to watch "Percy Jackson and the Lightening Thief".  Wow, what a wonderful afternoon with my girls!  First last night and then this afternoon.  We are planning to watch a few more movies soon too.  I simply just love spending time both with the Hubel family and the Muglia family.  They are so nice and good friends too.  Tomorrow I have 3 lessons so it will be a good day too so overall, a wonderful weekend.

The new medicine is not working as much as I hoped.  I tried the Cambia on a bad headache sometime this week and it didn't even make a dent in it.  I was rather disappointed but I am hopeful that something is out there that will help.  One day about a week ago, I DID wake up without a headache and boy was I happy!  By the afternoon, well, it was back.  But like Dr. R said, this is the lowest dosage and we have some room to wiggle as she calls it.  I do find that I get a dry mouth so easy with the new medicine.  I drink a lot of water now because of it.  Not that drinking water is bad, it is just unusual for me to drink this much.  I hope that it will help with the weight loss.  I go back and see Dr. R at the end of this month.  I also have to bring the films from the MRIs I had in 2008 when the doctors said I have an anomaly in my head (whatever that is).  She wants to look at them herself.  As she puts, she is anal that way.  I had to smile at that one.  I have a note to bring them with me to the appointment because otherwise I would totally forget!

I received a note from editors and I have been chosen as one of the best 21 Fibromyalgia Blogs for 2012.  I was so excited about this.  I mean, really?  How cool!  Several of the blogs I read also were on the list.  It is a neat thing to be on this list.

Camille had her lesson today.  She is doing so wonderfully.  She has switched to the Snell books.  They are harder than the other books we were using and her hands move everywhere and a lot.  Camille has no problem with that.  I was very pleased with her songs today.  Camille has lessons every other week for an hour.  Her Dad asked about competition today.  I said that I think Camille should go since she plays so well.  We worked on counting in 6/8 today.  She was having a bit of trouble with the new part in her Tarantella song in her lesson book.  I think we have worked it out and she understands now.  It is a new time signature for her.

Choir is not singing in church tomorrow so I can sleep in, which is good because I have a bad headache tonight.  The men in the choir are singing by themselves tomorrow.  It should be awesome.  Apparently, there will be a Sunday when we women from the choir sing by ourselves.  I do like the variety of music we sing.  Sometimes it is a classical choral piece, other times it is a contemporary and we have done several spirituals too.  The choir director, Lee, really likes to change things up.  I like how he does that because it really makes choir interesting.

Well, I am getting tired now so I think it is time for a bit of relaxing reading before bed.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Sunday 8-5

Calli has decided to drop piano for now and just keep singing instead.  I think she was a bit nervous to ask me but if this is what she wants, no problem.  She can always pick up piano at a later date.  Calli is going to sing "Over the Rainbow" for the Summer Concert.  Acer will sing "Wade in the Water" and play "Why Am I Blue?" on the piano.  They had make up lessons today since they were out of town on Friday.  Minh had her regularly scheduled lesson.  Sundays go much faster when I have some lessons.  I do have some music I need to put in Finale this week.  I need it before next Sunday when Rick comes back.  It is for the Summer Concert.

Tomorrow, my lovely Rachel will be absent.  She is such a cutie but she will be out of town.  She will be absent next week too.  I will miss the lovely girl until she gets back in town.  I think I have only 1 lesson tomorrow.  Although, I am hoping that perhaps Isaac is back and ready for lessons again.  He has been gone most of July.  It is hard to believe that school will be starting again for the students.  I have bought a few new notebooks for any new students I will hopefully have in the fall.  I have room for a few new students.  I have been working on paying the property taxes this summer.  I try to send in as much as possible, even if it only $25 since they will add up.  I should be able to have them all paid by the deadline.  I am pretty sure about it.

I have missed a lot of the Olympics this time.  I usually watch all the gymnastics.  It is my 2nd favorite sport to watch after Figure Skating.  I forget it is on until I go to bed and then I remember, oh yeah, gymnastics was on or swimming or anything else.  When Mom was here, Olympic time was sacred meaning don't ask for anything while she was watching her Olympics.  I warned Andrew to find another ride to work because Mom was glued to the TV during Olympics time.  he didn't believe and was so upset when he had to take a cab to work.  When we were at competition in February 2010, Mom and Tillie watched a lot of the winter Olympics in the hotel room while I was running around listening to my students.  I still smile of her excitement over the Olympics.  She didn't even care what country would win, it was just athletes doing their best.  Mom really liked the track and field in the summer games.  She used to do the long jump and run when she was a child.  I wish I could have seen that, of course being a daughter, there is no way to see a mother as a child.  Mom also ice skated as a child.  Mom was very into sports unlike me who leans towards the performing arts.

Well, I have to start a new book tonight.  I finished the one I was reading this afternoon before Minh's lesson.  It was a Kristin Hannah book.  Her books are very good and very interesting.  I also have a new book by John Grisham.  I am sure it is as good as his other books.

Here's to a start of another musical week!

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Hmmm, a Saturday Night 8-4

Once again I totally forgot about a bill and got stuck with the $35 late fee.  Ugh!  I know it is due on the 3rd.  I wish it was the 5th, but it is the 3rd.  Perhaps next month I will remember.  I also forgot to pay for the cable and internet last week.  I have fixed that one already.  oh, what can I say?  I am trying to be on top of things around here.

Today was a rather boring day because I had no lessons.  I know everyone needs a day off, but when I have days I don't teach with no plans, I am super duper bored.  I went to go and get gas but the gas station had no power so I couldn't get gas.  I will do that tomorrow before lessons after church.  Carolyn will not be in church tomorrow.  She is such a nice young lady.  I really like her family and her a lot.  They are good neighbors.  I have a lot of good neighbors that is for sure.

Tomorrow I will have Calli and Acer's lessons.  Calli made the state team for goal ball.  I am so proud of her.  She worked so hard for that opportunity.  I can't wait to meet her guide dog.  I have to start teaching the students that we cannot pet him because he is working.  That will be hard for the little ones  as their first impulse will be to pet and play with the dog.  I have to do some shopping for the BBQ this week because I need to spread out the cost of the meat over the month.  I do have some plasticware left over from last year so that is good.  I have to start the list of what I need for the party.  I am planning to do that tomorrow afternoon.  Calli will probably not have a piano piece ready for the summer concert, but I think over the rainbow should be ready.  She is such an amazing girl.  She really is.

I have the best students in the world.  Some days I sigh and think, I wish I could teach full time but I know that the last time I worked full time I was in and out of the hospital 15 times in 14 months so I don't think I can do that.  I am thankful for the students that I have that is for sure.  They are all so good.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Friday 8-3

It is so amazing to me that the older I get the faster time flies.  Hard to believe, but it is August already.  In 16 days is the summer concert.  I am so unprepared for that.

I had the follow up with the arthritis doctor.  I don't have the blood test results yet but I did have the results of the x-rays.  So far, the arthritis is in check and hasn't changed much since last year so that is good.  I think the physical therapy and the occupational therapy helped a lot.  I have learned some new exercises that help with the arthritis pain.  I am sure that losing more weight will help even more.  I hope to be 1/2 my size by the end of next summer.  That is my goal.  I priced some recumbent ellipticals and well, they are very expensive so I am hoping for one off of Craig's list or something like that.  Once I lose a bit more weight, I will worry about something like that.

I don't have any lessons tomorrow so that is a bit unusual for me.  It will be nice to have a break tomorrow.  I don't want a long break, just a day will be fine.  I have a lesson on Sunday in the late afternoon.  My student was in a car accident so she has to have someone drive her or loan her their car. She has a cracked rib and a few scrapes and bruises but overall she will be okay.  I am thankful for that.  So until she gets another car, we will have lessons on Sunday late afternoon.

I was hoping to see Calli and Acer today but they are out of town.  I am hoping that maybe they will have a lesson this weekend.  I haven't seen Calli in over a month.  I did see Acer.  We had lessons and also went grocery shopping.  He is almost ready for the summer concert.  I have to write down what everyone is playing at the concert this week.  I also need to purchase the hamburgers and veggie burgers since they come frozen, I can buy them at any time.

Well, time to read a bit before bed.