In 4 days will be another Christmas. It is still rather strange for me to realize that I am spending another holiday without my mother. It just doesn't seem like I should. I sometimes think I hear her in the house. I know it is my imagination but still I hear her. Sometimes I forget and look in her room for her. Then I remember she isn't here, she's in Heaven. I wonder how time goes on in Heaven. Is it fast? Or Slow? Is it anything like time here on Earth? Can she see me? Does she miss me? These are the questions that I often wonder. I don't think I will ever get used to Mom not being here. From what my friends say, it is normal and I probably will not ever get used to her being gone. I am not sure how Andrew or Richard are doing about this since they don't really discuss this type of stuff.
I only have 1 gift left to get and I will get it in Windsor on Sunday. I have everything besides the gift for Andrew. I will be wrapping gifts tomorrow. I have the cutest wrapping paper ever! They are super cute. I even found something cool for my aunt and uncle too. I got some gift certificates for Mr. and Mrs. Knight, Dan and Tracy Knight as well as Dan and Tracy's son. He is such a cutie. I have only seen him in pictures, not in person yet. I hope I remember to bring my camera so I can take some pictures of both days.
It was so cold, rainy, and damp yesterday that I ache so much. Today is better even though it snowed. The snow was mostly on the grass so that is okay. My car is back in the garage where it belongs. I had such a headache last night. Today is not as bad, thankfully, but I hope it improves and that it will be okay for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I am tired of the headaches limiting me from activities I like to do. Mainly, I have missed so much choir practice and church from the headaches. Well, hopefully the New Year will come without as many headaches. That is my wish. I think the medicine works a little bit but still not enough. I will see the doctor in about a month or so. If it doesn't get any better, than I will have to see her earlier than the appointment. My hands are twitching a bit still but from what I have read it can be part of fibro. They aren't as bad as they were so I am glad about it.
I am going to read for a bit before I go to bed.
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