Today was the day we buried Mom's ashes in the cemetery in Chatham, Ontario, Canada. Most of my cousins and my 2 uncles were there. Andrew was there too. Tillie had brought the ashes over Thursday thinking I would spend the night last night and then leave from there. Well, I ended up staying home and leaving from here. I am very tired today as I got up at 7 am and we all know how that is just the middle of the night to me. I am a 10 to 12 get up girl. It was a quick service. Andrew and Tillie spoke, I couldn't. I was just too upset. It seems like I have said goodbye to Mom for so long now. I can't believe it is over. Our house is so quiet. She wasn't very noisy but she was here. I could feel her in the house. Now I don't feel her in our house anymore. I did the week she was in the hospital, but I don't know. Sometimes I am lonely, sometimes I am not. I have never really felt lonely before except for the few times as a teenager as many teenagers do. It is weird to me to think I can go to sleep anytime I want and that I can get up at anytime that I want. I have much work planned for the week. Monday, I have either 7 or 4 lessons depending on the Muglia schedule. Because it is the 1st, sometimes we wait until the 8th. Whatever works for them, works for me. Tuesday, I am meeting with Mom's lawyer to go over the trust. Wednesday, I am going to Job Works and see what is available for me as far as programs go, being disabled, there might be something for me. I also have a lesson on Tuesday. Thursday is my tummy doctor's appointment check up. I go every 3 months to make sure the medicine is working well. Friday, I have nothing concrete planned. Saturday, I hope to have a lesson and perhaps Sunday too. I don't have any concrete plans for tomorrow except for hiding during trick or treat time. Mom was big on passing out candy and I am just not up for it this year. If Mom were here, then we would, but since she is gone, I am going to hide.
I am going to dinner with the Emertons. I have to remember to bring the pictures. Lily and Emily will giggle a lot at them. I did. I can't believe how big my hair got. Oh well, it was the style.
I hope this finds you doing well. Overall, I would say I am doing better than last week and definitely better than yesterday. I still miss Mom a lot, and I expect I will for a while. She was such a big part of my life. I know that she would be so disappointed in me if I just shrivel up and hide from the world. She wanted me to have a good life and I will, just will take some time to get that way. I want to thank all my bloggy friends for the support you have given me the last few difficult weeks. I have never lost anyone so close to me before and I am glad I have friends who support and care about me. It makes everything so much easier. I really appreciate all the comments I have gotten. Thank you!