It is hard to believe that the year is almost over. Hard to believe that a year ago, Momma was here with me doing pretty well. We had a good time for New Year's Eve and Day. We played games like monopoly, life, sorry, games like that. We loved playing them together. Now I am alone, and struggling to get through this.
I had two lessons today, Rachel and Rebecca. It went well. Rebecca has decided she wants to change her inspirational song for competition, not a problem, I have other choices for her. She has a good book with the CD to see what she likes or she can see what else I have. So far, Katie, Rachel, and Rebecca are coming along getting ready for competition. I am pleased with the way it is going so far. All students are doing well. I will spend the next week getting music ready for Kayla, my new one. She is 12 and goes to school near by here. They are about 5 miles from me. I am excited to meet her. I seem to come alive during teaching and not very much any other time.
I didn't sleep very well last night. I slept in until about 1 pm. I was shocked, that is two times this week I have slept that late. I am just having trouble figuring out when to take my nighttime medicine that will help me go to sleep at a good time. The new pain medicine helps me sleep better so that is good. That combined with my sleep medicine, helps me sleep better although I still wake up with pain during the night and have to get up to stretch out the pain before getting back into bed. I am getting used to sleeping by myself in the house. I miss having Mom in the house though. It was more comfort having another person in the house at night than sleeping by myself, but I can't really do anything about that. I am used to being alone most of the time. I still don't really like it, i am more of a need people around me person, but I am used to it. There is just so much that miss Momma for. She was my constant companion and I liked it. I know I am supposed to be liking this being by myself, according to family, but the bottom line is, I liked being with Mom. I miss doing things with her, simple things like going to the music store today. I needed a new bookkeeping book for next year. She would always look to see what was new in sheet music when we would go. She would look through the music for voice, piano, or for the woodwinds, to see if there was something that needed to be added to my library. It was fun for her and for me. Now, I can't buy any new music, but that doesn't really bother me because I have what I need. Yes, there is always stuff I would like, but I don't need anything. Right now, i am doing well with what music I have. If my students cannot find something they want to sing or play with what I have, then they have a problem. I have 3 file cabinets full of music so I have plenty. Yes, someday, I would like to be able to replace all the music that is missing, but I have replaced the stuff I really needed and the rest can wait.
I do hope that things are better in 2011. I am going to be actively looking for more students. I am also going to focus on making the house less cluttered. I know that I have a lot of stuff and need to go through and see what I want and what I want to sell or donate. I know some of Mom's stuff will go to Phoebe as she is about the only one I know who is tiny enough to fit into them. Phoebe loves hoodies and Mom had quite a few, some she didn't get to wear since I couldn't get to the closet and that is where they were. Lily is too small for them as she is only 12. I also have a couple of turtle necks that Phoebe will get. When I see Phoebe on Saturday I will give them to her. I also am going to continue to work on choosing better foods to eat and losing weight. I have started exercising a bit. It is going very slowly as I have trouble doing exercise because of the pain in my legs but I figure I have to start somewhere. I like to use both the eclipse and the stair climber. Both are very good for me as I can move my legs separately from my arms. If I do both at the same time, I ache more and can't breathe as well and then I have to stop sooner. I plan to have the other 1/2 of the family room to be for exercise. All I need is a TV and the DVD player as I like to watch DVDs while I exercise for a long time so I figure I will be at exercising at a longer time by the time the room will be ready. I have good plans for the house. I know that it will look really nice by the time I am finished. I don't plan to paint anything as I like all the colors we have, nor will I replace any of the furniture because it is good furniture. I am donating the old living room furniture that is currently in the family room because the room is being changed into an exercise/sewing room and there won't be any room for the furniture. I may be wrong, but that is the plan right now but I won't be doing anything about that until after tax season and Julie and I really start dig in. I am glad Mom redid the walls several years ago. We took down the panelling and had drywall and plaster up instead. I think the room looks much better this way. I didn't like the panelling anymore. It was very old school and the new walls really look good. The room has much potential. I just wish Momma was here to sew with me. Every time I sew though, I am with her because she is the one who taught me how.
It has been an alright day. I enjoyed the lessons and I am relaxing for the rest of the evening. I am very tired still, I didn't sleep very well last night. I am going to take my nighttime earlier than I did last night and I hope that help me sleep better tonight.
I hope your day was good too.
2011 is going to be a good year for you. I feel it. I don't want you to be sad. Be happoy because you have so many wonderful memories with your sweet mom. Smile girl. You are so important and so wonderful and talented. Have a blessed New Year and keep smiling. I need your address. Please e mail me. I have something I think you need. Hugs Anne
ReplyDeletewell i hope your plans for the family work in the new Year.
ReplyDeleteL8TR‼
~Lil'♥
Heather, you are not the only one who does not like to be alone! I went from living with my parents to being married and I've never lived alone, never want to although in all probability I will.
ReplyDeleteI hope 2011 is a better year for you, that you have many new students and always feel your mother's love surrounding you. Happy New Year!